RP: Aftermath - on two fronts
Date: May 2, 2003
Character(s): Angelina Johnson, Fred Weasley
Location: WWW Redux to start
Status: Private
Summary: It had taken a day to reflect after the festival, but Fred and Angelina realize a day after the fact they probably won't be ignoring things this time.
Completion: Complete
A simple touch between them had been enough to get them out of the maze.
But it hadn't been enough to erase exactly what they'd seen in it.
Not that Angelina was looking to on her part. It had been a sadistic exercise, but at the same time it had given her an understanding of Fred that she hadn't really had before. One that words couldn't give her. Fears didn't show everything, but it had shown her enough to know something important. Not that they'd had a chance to talk about it. Part of that was the lack of time - they'd done the dinner afterwards, though she'd have been just as content to get the fuck out of there and never have anything to do with this being ever again. But like always it came back to Fred, it came back to the town, and she'd stayed, uncomfortable through every moment, though it had given the opportunity to get a reassuring look at George.
The rest of it was avoidance. On her part no less.
It wasn't just contemplation, absorbing it all, it was actually to avoid the topic of the festival. It was seemingly uncharacteristic. After all she normally preferred to face things head on. And if it had been just what she had seen, she might have. Dragged him home with her after the festival and had it all out, tried to reassure him, and done anything she could to stop him from feeling as he did. Or, at the very least, talk about it in a way they hadn't yet. Logic didn't have a place in fears and worries, but understanding could help settle it - help them come closer at least.
But it wasn't just Fred; it wasn't just his fears that had been exposed.
And that took longer for her to absorb. So on a flimsy goodbye she'd apparated home as soon as she was able, talking about nothing.
What had he seen? What had he been forced to live through? It bothered her on the seemingly selfless level, that he would have been forced to live out her worst fears. Not that it had been a walk in the park for her, but she didn't even known what this fucking thing had pulled from the recesses of her mind. You might not focus on them, but different fears had been there always. Some superficial, some not, and even she couldn't sort the difference. And she didn't want him to have had to see any of them, or feel any of them.
And the real reason was a more selfish one. She didn't like being layed bare that way. There were things she didn't want him to know about her. Half were things she didn't want to know about herself. Because the more she thought about it, the more she came up with. It was like legilmency in it's own way, how it stripped you of the privacy and offered you up to whoever was looking. It was made both worse and better because it had been him - better because she trusted him, worse because she cared about him, and worse because he had...allusions, maybe a certain perception of her and her life she didn't want entirely spoiled.
It was her that forced it to the forefront Friday however.
May 2nd had always been a day of mixed emotions on her calender, delving more and more towards the depressing each year. The day she'd been called back to Hogwarts, the day Voldemort had actually been defeated - and also the day Fred had died, many had died or suffered. And each year, as things got worse in the wizarding world in spite of the sacrifices, she hated to see it pass, more often than not finding herself at the Leaky Cauldron or something similar, after a trip to Fred's grave, if she could avoid the Weasleys for her own private moment.
But this year the day represented one less sacrifice, even if it hadn't changed much else. And she wanted to visit the real Fred this time, not put him off - not another day, another week - because she was resembling a yellow bellied hypogryff more than the woman she actually was.
It didn't make it any easier however as she left her flat. A knock on his door showed him not home. But making her way to WWW Redux found her target. Angelina stood outside for a moment, watching him work, before slipping through the door. The store was silent for the moment, and she had no idea how long it would last. It might have been better to wait till later that evening, but she didn't want to go back. Instead she made her way up to the counter where Fred stood.
She'd meant to offer a different preamble. How glad she was he was here and alive maybe, but instead the first words out of her mouth were much self-centered.
"What did you see in the maze?" Angelina asked quietly, forcing herself not to reach for a product to fiddle with, keeping her eyes locked on his. She wasn't belligerent, but her actions were her defense mechanism.
Character(s): Angelina Johnson, Fred Weasley
Location: WWW Redux to start
Status: Private
Summary: It had taken a day to reflect after the festival, but Fred and Angelina realize a day after the fact they probably won't be ignoring things this time.
Completion: Complete
A simple touch between them had been enough to get them out of the maze.
But it hadn't been enough to erase exactly what they'd seen in it.
Not that Angelina was looking to on her part. It had been a sadistic exercise, but at the same time it had given her an understanding of Fred that she hadn't really had before. One that words couldn't give her. Fears didn't show everything, but it had shown her enough to know something important. Not that they'd had a chance to talk about it. Part of that was the lack of time - they'd done the dinner afterwards, though she'd have been just as content to get the fuck out of there and never have anything to do with this being ever again. But like always it came back to Fred, it came back to the town, and she'd stayed, uncomfortable through every moment, though it had given the opportunity to get a reassuring look at George.
The rest of it was avoidance. On her part no less.
It wasn't just contemplation, absorbing it all, it was actually to avoid the topic of the festival. It was seemingly uncharacteristic. After all she normally preferred to face things head on. And if it had been just what she had seen, she might have. Dragged him home with her after the festival and had it all out, tried to reassure him, and done anything she could to stop him from feeling as he did. Or, at the very least, talk about it in a way they hadn't yet. Logic didn't have a place in fears and worries, but understanding could help settle it - help them come closer at least.
But it wasn't just Fred; it wasn't just his fears that had been exposed.
And that took longer for her to absorb. So on a flimsy goodbye she'd apparated home as soon as she was able, talking about nothing.
What had he seen? What had he been forced to live through? It bothered her on the seemingly selfless level, that he would have been forced to live out her worst fears. Not that it had been a walk in the park for her, but she didn't even known what this fucking thing had pulled from the recesses of her mind. You might not focus on them, but different fears had been there always. Some superficial, some not, and even she couldn't sort the difference. And she didn't want him to have had to see any of them, or feel any of them.
And the real reason was a more selfish one. She didn't like being layed bare that way. There were things she didn't want him to know about her. Half were things she didn't want to know about herself. Because the more she thought about it, the more she came up with. It was like legilmency in it's own way, how it stripped you of the privacy and offered you up to whoever was looking. It was made both worse and better because it had been him - better because she trusted him, worse because she cared about him, and worse because he had...allusions, maybe a certain perception of her and her life she didn't want entirely spoiled.
It was her that forced it to the forefront Friday however.
May 2nd had always been a day of mixed emotions on her calender, delving more and more towards the depressing each year. The day she'd been called back to Hogwarts, the day Voldemort had actually been defeated - and also the day Fred had died, many had died or suffered. And each year, as things got worse in the wizarding world in spite of the sacrifices, she hated to see it pass, more often than not finding herself at the Leaky Cauldron or something similar, after a trip to Fred's grave, if she could avoid the Weasleys for her own private moment.
But this year the day represented one less sacrifice, even if it hadn't changed much else. And she wanted to visit the real Fred this time, not put him off - not another day, another week - because she was resembling a yellow bellied hypogryff more than the woman she actually was.
It didn't make it any easier however as she left her flat. A knock on his door showed him not home. But making her way to WWW Redux found her target. Angelina stood outside for a moment, watching him work, before slipping through the door. The store was silent for the moment, and she had no idea how long it would last. It might have been better to wait till later that evening, but she didn't want to go back. Instead she made her way up to the counter where Fred stood.
She'd meant to offer a different preamble. How glad she was he was here and alive maybe, but instead the first words out of her mouth were much self-centered.
"What did you see in the maze?" Angelina asked quietly, forcing herself not to reach for a product to fiddle with, keeping her eyes locked on his. She wasn't belligerent, but her actions were her defense mechanism.