Underworld 4
It was everything I thought it would be.
Kate Beckinsale wore an amazingly implausible combat catsuit, and bent in ways that corset should not have allowed.
A number of interchangeable men* ran around behind Kate Beckinsale and did manly things whilst never being quite as hard as Kate Beckinsale.
It turned out that fugitive vampires, hunted to the edge of extinction by humanity, had somehow still ended up living in impressive caverns filled with attractive gothic masonry. I bet not a single decent stonemason survived the dark ages unbitten.
After spending three films making the Lycans complex characters with their own motivations, this film decided they were actually basically all slavering evil who just did bad stuff. I wept for the glorious (but dead) Lucian. I do not think he would have approved.
About a third of the way through, I suspect the script writer looked at what he had done, and hung himself. This issue was brought to the director who looked at the script, looked at the film, and then said 'sod it. Lets just fill the rest of the film with fight scenes. No one will care'.
I also suspect them of trying for a fifth film.
On some level this worries me. But I'll go and see it anyway.
(Lucian and Viktor, I miss you! It's not the same without your scenery chewing, eye rolling, ham waving, dress wearing, set rampaging gloriousness. Please come back, somehow. I know you're both dead, but continuity has never been a huge concern of this series before)
*one of whom (very excitingly) was poor dead Mr Pamuk from Downton Abbey.
Kate Beckinsale wore an amazingly implausible combat catsuit, and bent in ways that corset should not have allowed.
A number of interchangeable men* ran around behind Kate Beckinsale and did manly things whilst never being quite as hard as Kate Beckinsale.
It turned out that fugitive vampires, hunted to the edge of extinction by humanity, had somehow still ended up living in impressive caverns filled with attractive gothic masonry. I bet not a single decent stonemason survived the dark ages unbitten.
After spending three films making the Lycans complex characters with their own motivations, this film decided they were actually basically all slavering evil who just did bad stuff. I wept for the glorious (but dead) Lucian. I do not think he would have approved.
About a third of the way through, I suspect the script writer looked at what he had done, and hung himself. This issue was brought to the director who looked at the script, looked at the film, and then said 'sod it. Lets just fill the rest of the film with fight scenes. No one will care'.
I also suspect them of trying for a fifth film.
On some level this worries me. But I'll go and see it anyway.
(Lucian and Viktor, I miss you! It's not the same without your scenery chewing, eye rolling, ham waving, dress wearing, set rampaging gloriousness. Please come back, somehow. I know you're both dead, but continuity has never been a huge concern of this series before)
*one of whom (very excitingly) was poor dead Mr Pamuk from Downton Abbey.