Ficlet: Entropy (CSI, Sara/Grissom)
OMG. Words. Not necessarily the ones you wanted, but here they are. Best birthday present ever. :)
Title: Entropy
Author: Annerb
Summary: They’ve been here before.
Fandom: CSI: Las Vegas
Rating: G
Classifications: Sara/Grissom, angst, ‘Forget Me Not’ post-ep
Entropy
It had been this way between them from the beginning-she drawing nearer, him pushing away just enough to snap her back to the periphery until something started slipping again, the distance eroding. She remembered it as dizzying and frustrating, but something almost like breathing.
She wonders if she’d gotten too used to the pull, the moving apart and together. Maybe that’s why she was always running away from him, always the one to slip away, after he’d finally let her in. Maybe she was just trying to relive the feel of it.
Maybe she always assumed he would follow.
But he cut the string between them, and now everything is stillness.
She isn’t so much stuck as rooted. This warped city, this lab, it has become a home for her, a center. Nick and Greg, but also new faces, bringing a freshness and energy to what otherwise can feel like casual suffocation. (She knows this, has been dragged down by broken little girls too many times before.) She feels steady here, strong and fierce and buttressed and invincible. She feels exactly what this place once meant to him.
Once. But no longer.
He’d left because while now he drifts across the world on a breeze of whimsy and opportunity, staying here had been an anchor around his waist in a watery expanse.
He can’t come back. She can’t go. An impasse. Painful, airless stillness.
They’ve been here before.
She survives because she knows that life is never still for long. This job shows her that on a daily basis. She wades through the debris of people’s lives, sees the way human cruelty can tip everything on its axis, shift the steadiest foundation. Knows that breezes shift without any warning.
She waits. She works and waits and listens for that first telltale creak. A shift of air.
So they can begin again.
Title: Entropy
Author: Annerb
Summary: They’ve been here before.
Fandom: CSI: Las Vegas
Rating: G
Classifications: Sara/Grissom, angst, ‘Forget Me Not’ post-ep
Entropy
It had been this way between them from the beginning-she drawing nearer, him pushing away just enough to snap her back to the periphery until something started slipping again, the distance eroding. She remembered it as dizzying and frustrating, but something almost like breathing.
She wonders if she’d gotten too used to the pull, the moving apart and together. Maybe that’s why she was always running away from him, always the one to slip away, after he’d finally let her in. Maybe she was just trying to relive the feel of it.
Maybe she always assumed he would follow.
But he cut the string between them, and now everything is stillness.
She isn’t so much stuck as rooted. This warped city, this lab, it has become a home for her, a center. Nick and Greg, but also new faces, bringing a freshness and energy to what otherwise can feel like casual suffocation. (She knows this, has been dragged down by broken little girls too many times before.) She feels steady here, strong and fierce and buttressed and invincible. She feels exactly what this place once meant to him.
Once. But no longer.
He’d left because while now he drifts across the world on a breeze of whimsy and opportunity, staying here had been an anchor around his waist in a watery expanse.
He can’t come back. She can’t go. An impasse. Painful, airless stillness.
They’ve been here before.
She survives because she knows that life is never still for long. This job shows her that on a daily basis. She wades through the debris of people’s lives, sees the way human cruelty can tip everything on its axis, shift the steadiest foundation. Knows that breezes shift without any warning.
She waits. She works and waits and listens for that first telltale creak. A shift of air.
So they can begin again.