Epic Notes and Tidal Locking
*sigh*
Writing this in OpenOffice, as I have no internet, and my first question is... WHY THE FUCK DOES OO TURN EVERYTHING BETWEEN *'S BOLD?! GOOD GOD!
I'm calm. I'm good.
ANYways.
In my effort to post more often, I have decided to let everyone (the what, three people who read this? HAI U GUIS) into my life a little more. Towards that end, I present what happened to my history notes near the end of Western Civ this morning.
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Henry II of England, great-grandson of William the Conqueror
king of England 1154-1189
marries Eleanor of Aquitaine
1180 new Capetian king Philip II of France until 1223
John becomes English king 1199
John fucks up
travelling in France in 1202, meets Isabella, they elope
Isabella is already engaged to a dude named Hugh
both men vassals of Philip
Hugh appeals to Philip
Philip summons both
John's all “WHAT BITCH I'MA KING OF ENGLAND! MIGHTY JOHN IS MIGHTY, AND SHALL NOT BOW DOWN TO YOU!”
Philip's all “WHAT BITCH THEN I TAKE AWAY NORMANDY! CEILINGCAT GIVETH AND CEILINGCAT TAKETH AWAY, AND CEILINGCAT'S GIVIN' ME NORMANDY BACK!”
John's all “WHAT NO DON'T SMACK ME I RUN AWAY TO ENGLAND NOW KTHXBAI!”
Philip's all “OHOHOHOHOHO I HAVE NORMANDY BACK MUAHAHAHA!”
Isabella's all “OH, JOHN, YOU'RE SO MANLY! SEXY MAN IS SEXY!”
Hugh's all “I CRY BITTER TEARS, AS I HAVE GAINED NOTHING. NOTHIIIIIING!”
pope Innocent III 1207
in spite of the name, Innocent's actually kind of a dick
John wants to appoint bishops, Innocent's all like “NO WAI YOU EXCOMMUNICATED KTHXBAI!”
John's all “I NO LISTEN”
Innocent's all “YOU NOT KING ANY MORE”, kind of totally copying Gregory VII's move; part of why he's kind of a dick-- copyright infringement
Innocent and Philip all like “WONDER TWIN POWERS-- ACTIVATE! FORM OF TAKING OVER ENGLAND!”
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*shakes head sadly*
Oh, me. See how well I was doing there, at the beginning? I was taking good notes, guys! And then... that happened. XD
Ah, well. I regret nothing.
Ohohoh (yes I'm rambling, hush) I finished my geology paper on time! :D All this glorious BS about exoplanets, and lithification, and tidal locking, and SHUT UP I WAS THINKING ABOUT STAR WARS THE WHOLE TIME! I was like OH MY GOD I'M TOTALLY WRITING ABOUT RYLOTH! YAAAAAAAY!
(Note: for the uneducated among you few actually educated enough to read this, Ryloth is the homeworld of the Twi'leks. Remember the ones with the tentacles attached to their skulls? The creeper Bib Fortuna who helped Jabba, and the blue whores dancers? Yeah, them.)
...I think that's all for now. 8D