reality.
i just woke up from the saddest dream.
i was back in california for a friend's birthday- the specific friend is unclear to me at this point, as the details are already slipping away. so, birthday celebration at an italian? restaurant and guess who's shown up to celebrate? leonardo dicaprio, love of my youth!! he was so small, but hahah, that is not important. towards the end of the pahty, i've finally worked up the courage to talk to leo, so i saunter over and we begin to have a REAL <3 2 <3 conversation about the craaaaaft. we've barely scraped the surface when OHNO party is over! he's signing autographs for the fan grlz and i'm so above that shit,
so i'm like "yo, leobaby, it's been great to meet you. i'm sorry we couldn't continue this beaaautiful exchange."
and he was like "do you wanna go somewhere? like, the beach or...?"
and i was like "4sure! let me get my coat."
and he was like "cool, bb, i b outside in my car."
i'm gathering my personal effects, taking a bit longer than expected 'cause everyone's like "where are you going!!" and i'm like "shut it, bitches!" so i get outside and... he's gone! i stand there for a second, waiting. then my mother comes outside and was like,
"leonardo dicaprio was here waiting for you a second ago, saying you two were going to go somewhere, but i told him you weren't going to be coming out."
!!!
what. my own mother cock-blocked me from my own personal arnie grape/jack/romeo.
and as if that wasn't enough, she was like,
"oh, he left you this."
and she pulled a note out of our rosebushes.
"kbaby, it was lovely to meet you. stay sexy, girl. <3, leo."
and then i woke up.
fuck.
i was back in california for a friend's birthday- the specific friend is unclear to me at this point, as the details are already slipping away. so, birthday celebration at an italian? restaurant and guess who's shown up to celebrate? leonardo dicaprio, love of my youth!! he was so small, but hahah, that is not important. towards the end of the pahty, i've finally worked up the courage to talk to leo, so i saunter over and we begin to have a REAL <3 2 <3 conversation about the craaaaaft. we've barely scraped the surface when OHNO party is over! he's signing autographs for the fan grlz and i'm so above that shit,
so i'm like "yo, leobaby, it's been great to meet you. i'm sorry we couldn't continue this beaaautiful exchange."
and he was like "do you wanna go somewhere? like, the beach or...?"
and i was like "4sure! let me get my coat."
and he was like "cool, bb, i b outside in my car."
i'm gathering my personal effects, taking a bit longer than expected 'cause everyone's like "where are you going!!" and i'm like "shut it, bitches!" so i get outside and... he's gone! i stand there for a second, waiting. then my mother comes outside and was like,
"leonardo dicaprio was here waiting for you a second ago, saying you two were going to go somewhere, but i told him you weren't going to be coming out."
!!!
what. my own mother cock-blocked me from my own personal arnie grape/jack/romeo.
and as if that wasn't enough, she was like,
"oh, he left you this."
and she pulled a note out of our rosebushes.
"kbaby, it was lovely to meet you. stay sexy, girl. <3, leo."
and then i woke up.
fuck.