(no subject)
Are you ever afraid of who God has called you to be? I am all of the time. I am afraid to step off of the cliff into the unknown completely abandoned, I am afraid of how far the Lord will take me and where He will take me and how He will take me. I know partly my calling, soemthing I dont freely share with people bc sometimes if I dont acknowledge it then I think noone else will know. I know to the level that God has called me. Sometimes I wish that I didnt but I kind of do. I get scared that I will forfeit my destiny sometimes. God does not ever make up do anything He always gives us a choice. Right now I see the choice to die. I see a series of choices to die every day of my life. I have found myself praying "kill me for the vision" in prayer times past but I had no idea what that would entail. I prayed in ignorance. Now I try to hold on to the life that is not mine to hold onto. I am learning so much about the Lord that i never even dreamed of. He is looking for so much more than is preached out there. He is looking for those who will be recklessly abandoned and obedient unto death. I truly beleieve that the next generation will be radical yet solid in every sense. They will walk in extreme living yet be rooted and grounded in the word of God. Who among this generation will lead them??? Who is willing to pay the price to be the forerunner that blazes the trail for these new leaders to walk. Whats scary about a forerunner is that they go where no man has gone before. They blaze the trail, they dont have a model or framework of what they are supposed to do, they just take the hand of the Father and go. This generation coming needs mentors that are going to die to themselves fully so that another generation can be raised up that will begin to step into their calling of being a generation that will prepare the bride for the second coming. Every time I read the word, preparing the bride and the end times scream out at me, i cant get past it. It is always a message of longing in the bridegrooms heart for His bride to MAKE HERSELF READY. See all of this time I thought that He was going to make me ready, but He is waiting for me to submit and to make myself ready. We have a choice. I guess sometimes I really dont like having a choice bc if I choose something and then i dont like it I can blame God! But He gives us a choice.