I wanna be on Broad St.
The Phillies won the World Series, and I wasn't with a few of my best friends to enjoy it. I hate the change of seasons here in Buffalo. It just reminds me of undergrad, which was so amazing compared to the perpetual gray skies nowadays. If ever a time for me to start taking Prozac, this is it. I miss him, even though I shouldn't. I want to go out tonight for Halloween, but can't, since I was asked to open tomorrow at 6:45 a.m. so my coworkers can go out in slutty costumes and get wasted. I don't want to work, even though I desperately need the money. I can't be dependent on my parents too much longer. I should have stayed self sufficient after I moved back here. I don't want to go home for Thanksgiving this year; I want to go downstate even though I can't and last year was awful and I should have seen things coming. I haven't taken off my "mask" in awhile, but Halloween seems like the night to do it. I haven't felt like this in so long, I thought I was healing. I want to be on Broad Street with Erin and Carla, celebrating my fake hometown heroes. I don't want to cite sources in a reflection paper that should be two pages long. I don't want to write a grant proposal when my teacher says that it's dumb, but the state mandates it. I don't want people to make a stupid choice on Tuesday. I don't want to live in fear anymore. No one has any idea what it's like here. I've done a good job avoiding certain places and even certain intersections, but eventually it won't work. I want Sarah Palin to be kidnapped by wolves (that she tried to kill previously) and replace her with my mom and see if anyone else notices the radical shift in rhetoric to something that sounds logical and pro-woman. I'm tired of worrying about my family's financial future. I'm just tired.