So how was it?
I walk out of the subway, and down a sidestreet surroudned by old beautiful buildings, filled with flags and flowers. The streets small, like the cars... The sidewalk is falling apart, with grass and weeds growing between it's age. Bikes go wissing by, and teenagers are done up in support. Behind that tree, we all take the hot walk to the same Union game. It's a dusty road, filled with faces old and hard, young and jaded, yet everyone has a smile. I meet a man who has been dedicated fan his whole life, like his father and the father before him. He wishes to tell you about anything but the game,but there is nothing there to tell. Here is a place not to forget but to remember.
The game is about to start. We see not a member on the feild. It's a vast range of pateince. As I walk, he tells me. The fans and the players made this feild. They made these cement stands, and this feild. We made the very thing we love, no-one else. This is our home. This is our smiles. And he didn't lie. What are seats? There are none here. It is flat cement plakes, filled with dirst and grass. Teh bars in the front, where the chikldren are, the paint is decades old. The other team is next to us, with eqaul amount of space and passion. Everything is torn and run down, but the feild itself. A perfect rectangle of fresh grass. The sun is a undeliable annoyance, but no-one minds. The stands get ready, and start to sing songs, native and american. The players arrive on the feild and the game begins. The brutleness on the feild, like I have never seen, but a fairness that leaves me speachless..
As this short game continues, the more and more I understand these people. Their favoriote team is loosing..yet they clap and smile with every goal the other team makes. Everyone claps here, everyone sings here. A foal, a player made an illegal move making them miss the shot. Still, not a frown, just a clap and a pat. I hear the beetles, and then the rolling stones..they yell back and forth back and forth... the ball is thrown in, and headbutted in the goal. Couples kiss and friends hug, as the other team claps and nods their heads. Every person is dripping with sweat, and beer is running high. Why am I enjoying a soccor game? I ask myself. Is it even possable..
They win the game, by a mircle.
No-one is yelling. No-one is blaming, no-one cares.
We get on the train, and everyone is drunk. Drunk and obsence.
If this behavior happening around me happened in America, there would be a CNN report to ban it. I can see it..
" FANS AT GAMES OUT OF CONTROL! SOMEONE MUST STEP IN NOW!"
Teeenagers drunk, adults, old people. Everyone is happy.
And thats what we like to take away in America don't we? True Freedom.
Freedom is within the mind and the heart
and these people couldn't be more free.
More free than we could ever be.
Becuase they understand and respect their culture,
themsleves and who and what they love.
---
There are many things that I need to talk about and get out in the open as my last year living in Maryland.
Friends mean everything to me.
I say I hate people, but I really love them
I love helping people, I love giving people advice.
I love when my friends give me comments, and say they love me.
I love partys, and groups of friends having fun
Friends calling me up randomly
Freinds from classes, and then forgeting
Old friends, who want to catch up.
I love friends. I love the concept of friends. I love the fact that people can become attached to other people and share the world around them good and bad.
Have I only created empty friendships and memeories?
This is Anna's life the past year or 2
I meet someone, They are ALL into me
We start to hang out all the time
We become friends
We tell each other everything..
I start to get attached mentally
They start to get mentally unattached
They act like everything is the same as it was, even though I know it's not.
Friendship lost.
I miss, the feeling of always knowing someone is there for me. It's funny becuase, while I was giving everyone a smile, advice and good times, I was being left out in the dust.
I wish I could understand what I do, to push people so close to me, and then go far away. But it's just me, and it's just who I am. I dont know where people stand with me anymore. I don't know what it means for someone to say " I love you" anymore. Everyone seems to have their own opinion. When I say "I love you", I mean it. When I tell my friends I love them, I fucking mean it.
I know it all started with Insley. I know thats where it all got fucked up in my life, but not because of her, becuase of how I handeled her. She was the first person that ever showed me a different side of myself, that I didnt understand. I am sorry to all of you, you know who you are. I wish you could understand how much I miss you. I miss the laughing and the simplness of not caring about anythign else but what we made for oursleves. I miss those times more than anything.
I think it's really great that you are good now. I think it's really great that I could introduce you to someone I cared about more than anything. I'm really thrilled that you guys all find a close friendship within each other. Why should I envy something that never belonged to me anyways right..
Stop being fake.
I dont want to feel like I am running away after next year,
I want to feel like I am leaving a place where I can call home.
I know I have done the very things people have done to me.
Im not an ignorant fool
I know people change and get differnt intrests like myself.
Thats no reason why people can't talk anymore.
We need to be able to understand the people in our lives, as the Germans in that stadium, understood the love for their team.
The game is about to start. We see not a member on the feild. It's a vast range of pateince. As I walk, he tells me. The fans and the players made this feild. They made these cement stands, and this feild. We made the very thing we love, no-one else. This is our home. This is our smiles. And he didn't lie. What are seats? There are none here. It is flat cement plakes, filled with dirst and grass. Teh bars in the front, where the chikldren are, the paint is decades old. The other team is next to us, with eqaul amount of space and passion. Everything is torn and run down, but the feild itself. A perfect rectangle of fresh grass. The sun is a undeliable annoyance, but no-one minds. The stands get ready, and start to sing songs, native and american. The players arrive on the feild and the game begins. The brutleness on the feild, like I have never seen, but a fairness that leaves me speachless..
As this short game continues, the more and more I understand these people. Their favoriote team is loosing..yet they clap and smile with every goal the other team makes. Everyone claps here, everyone sings here. A foal, a player made an illegal move making them miss the shot. Still, not a frown, just a clap and a pat. I hear the beetles, and then the rolling stones..they yell back and forth back and forth... the ball is thrown in, and headbutted in the goal. Couples kiss and friends hug, as the other team claps and nods their heads. Every person is dripping with sweat, and beer is running high. Why am I enjoying a soccor game? I ask myself. Is it even possable..
They win the game, by a mircle.
No-one is yelling. No-one is blaming, no-one cares.
We get on the train, and everyone is drunk. Drunk and obsence.
If this behavior happening around me happened in America, there would be a CNN report to ban it. I can see it..
" FANS AT GAMES OUT OF CONTROL! SOMEONE MUST STEP IN NOW!"
Teeenagers drunk, adults, old people. Everyone is happy.
And thats what we like to take away in America don't we? True Freedom.
Freedom is within the mind and the heart
and these people couldn't be more free.
More free than we could ever be.
Becuase they understand and respect their culture,
themsleves and who and what they love.
---
There are many things that I need to talk about and get out in the open as my last year living in Maryland.
Friends mean everything to me.
I say I hate people, but I really love them
I love helping people, I love giving people advice.
I love when my friends give me comments, and say they love me.
I love partys, and groups of friends having fun
Friends calling me up randomly
Freinds from classes, and then forgeting
Old friends, who want to catch up.
I love friends. I love the concept of friends. I love the fact that people can become attached to other people and share the world around them good and bad.
Have I only created empty friendships and memeories?
This is Anna's life the past year or 2
I meet someone, They are ALL into me
We start to hang out all the time
We become friends
We tell each other everything..
I start to get attached mentally
They start to get mentally unattached
They act like everything is the same as it was, even though I know it's not.
Friendship lost.
I miss, the feeling of always knowing someone is there for me. It's funny becuase, while I was giving everyone a smile, advice and good times, I was being left out in the dust.
I wish I could understand what I do, to push people so close to me, and then go far away. But it's just me, and it's just who I am. I dont know where people stand with me anymore. I don't know what it means for someone to say " I love you" anymore. Everyone seems to have their own opinion. When I say "I love you", I mean it. When I tell my friends I love them, I fucking mean it.
I know it all started with Insley. I know thats where it all got fucked up in my life, but not because of her, becuase of how I handeled her. She was the first person that ever showed me a different side of myself, that I didnt understand. I am sorry to all of you, you know who you are. I wish you could understand how much I miss you. I miss the laughing and the simplness of not caring about anythign else but what we made for oursleves. I miss those times more than anything.
I think it's really great that you are good now. I think it's really great that I could introduce you to someone I cared about more than anything. I'm really thrilled that you guys all find a close friendship within each other. Why should I envy something that never belonged to me anyways right..
Stop being fake.
I dont want to feel like I am running away after next year,
I want to feel like I am leaving a place where I can call home.
I know I have done the very things people have done to me.
Im not an ignorant fool
I know people change and get differnt intrests like myself.
Thats no reason why people can't talk anymore.
We need to be able to understand the people in our lives, as the Germans in that stadium, understood the love for their team.