Through the Glass, Part 6
Through the Glass, Part 6
Pairing: Beckett/McKay, McKay/OFC
Rating: NC-17 (this chapter)
Warning: adult themes
summary: Carson fantasizes, Ashleigh schemes and Rodney dreams.
Carson pushed the stool back from the counter and stood to peer into the microscope again. The sample he was looking at blurred and he started to adjust the scope before he realized it wasn't the equipment that was causing it, it was his eyes.
Damn, he was tired. He curled a foot around the leg of the stool and drew it close to the counter again so that he could slump onto it. His elbows dropped to the glossy black surface and his face dropped into his hands.
For a moment he considered telling Elizabeth that he couldn't do this anymore. No more work on a retro-virus, no more using his gene-therapy as a bartering tool. No more using the work of his hands to give as tools to men with only their own interests at heart.
He'd wanted to make things better! That's why he went into medicine, what his lifework was supposed to be about. Instead, a whole planet was dead and a tyrant had nearly gained control of another - because of his gene research.
And now, now Elizabeth wanted him to find a way to turn Wraith into humans. He wished bitterly he had never suggested that it might be possible. The possibility of it all going horribly wrong loomed and he knew in his bones that somehow, even if he made it work, even if he could turn Wraith into humans, it would come back to bite them all in the ass.
A deep sigh worked its way up. Definitely time to call it a day. It took him a few seconds to back-up his research notes and close down the computer. A spare thought dimmed the lights and locked the door as he left for his quarters. He should eat, but the way his stomach tightened at the thought convinced him not to try.
It would be nice, he thought, to have someone waiting for him in his quarters. Someone he could go home to, talk to about his worries. He was a bit old to be wishing for his mother, but the longing to be comforted was overwhelming.
His quarters were dark and seemed a little cold, though he knew it was no chillier there than anywhere else in the city. He peeled off the lab coat and slipped out of his shoes. It was really too much effort to undress at the moment and he flopped back on the bed still fully clothed.
It'd be nice if Rodney would stop by. If anyone would understand how he felt, it would be Rodney. A man who had built a bomb only to have his best friend use it on a suicide run would have some inkling of how he felt. Though that wasn't all of it, was it?
There was something comforting about the man's presence. Something that drew him and made him want to seek him out. Ah hell, there was more to it than that, might as well admit it. That crooked smile and the rarely-heard laugh made him feel happy. He missed the man, wanted to be around him, wanted more than that, but never dared to let it show.
It was confusing. Before Cadman had hijacked Rodney's body for that kiss, Carson had entertained only passing curiosity about other men. Now, the idea had been planted. The force behind the kiss had been female, but the hands that had grabbed his lapels and held him still had been male, the chest he bumped against had been breastless, the lips were firm and strong and the smell had been pure Rodney. The idea of a partner who was stronger and solid and could shelter him, make him feel protected -- that was inviting.
The thought of it made his groin twitch and he began to harden. He pictured the kiss in his head again, imagined them standing in his room instead of the lab, alone.
Rodney would pull him close by his shirt, then slide one hand around to cup his neck before kissing him. Those firm lips would nibble and tease his into opening, then that clever tongue would swoop in and take control of his mouth.
As Carson's fantasy evolved, he slid one hand into his pants while using the other to open the button and zipper. His cock popped free of the cloth and he started a slow slide up and down.
Rodney would move his mouth down, nibbling his ear and neck. Carson would be held in strong arms that would wrap around his shoulders before moving down to grab his ass, pressing his erection against the other. That would feel good, he was sure.
After kissing him thoroughly, Rodney would turn him, make Carson lean back against him and start nuzzling that sensitive spot at the nape. The spot that made him shiver in response. Rodney's deft hands would undo his pants and let them drop so that he could release his aching flesh.
There, leaning against that firm chest, between Rodney's strong legs, Carson would let him touch him, let him stroke his cock and cup his scrotum, feel his breath against his neck.
The fantasy allowed Carson to imagine that it was not his own hands bringing him to completion, not his own fingers sweeping down to tease his anus. In his mind, Rodney stroked and touched, and the orgasm, when it hit, left him weak and nearly in tears.
He levered himself up to look at the mess on his shirt. It would never happen. Rodney had his lady now, and no time for his friends. The ache in his chest deepened at the thought.
Mechanically, he stripped off the slimy shirt and stood to let the pants fall free. He stepped out of the puddle of cloth and moved toward where his lab coat lay. There was something there that could help him, at least allow him to fall asleep.
Mentally, he set the device for 3 minutes, upping the intensity level a little and sat back on the bed before telling it to start.
~*~*~*~
Ashleigh knew that soon she'd have to sleep with Rodney. She was frankly amazed that he hadn't pushed her for it more. It was a good thing that the man was so touch-starved that he had settled for kisses and soft words for this long. And needy! God, the man practically begged for the littlest bit of affection. No spine at all, which was sad, so she guessed she shouldn't be surprised that he wasn't being more forward.
Thankfully, there were some real men around who could give her what she wanted. Oh, she liked her control, yes, even got off on it a bit. That sense of power over someone who had authority made her hot. But there was something to be said for a man you could respect ravishing you, taking you hard and fast.
Something she was willing to bet that this sad little man holding her would never give her. They were on the bed, solely because there was no other furniture in the room. He leaned against the wall and she leaned against him. She could feel his fingers ghosting down her arm and back up, his lips nuzzling her hair. His other hand was holding one of hers, fingers twined together. It was all so… sweet. Sappy even. If he were a real man, he would have already pinned her to the bed and gotten her clothes off.
Still, he was malleable this way. She could pretty much get him to do whatever she wanted at these times, so she supposed it was worth the tedium.
"Honey, I heard about what happened on the mission…" she spoke softly.
"Hmm? What do you mean?"
"You were trapped underground and nearly got killed!" She sat up and looked at him, let her eyes well up with unshed tears. "I nearly lost you today!"
"Huh? Well, that was… that was nothing, really. Part of the job, you know."
It was all she could do not to roll her eyes, so she ducked her head down. This guy was pathetic. Still, he was necessary to her plan, so she had to keep him alive and that meant…
"Rodney, why do you even have to go on these missions? You're too important to m-- to the city to risk that way!"
"Well, yes, but it is necessary. There simply isn't anyone else."
Mentally, she sighed and gave up. Her plan required her to control this man and if he wasn't in the city, she couldn't. Worse yet, if he actually died on one of those missions, she would have to start over on someone else. Luckily, she had a Plan B. Sheppard. The man was nowhere near smart enough to get out of her trap, now that she had the means to control him, too. And once she got Weir out of her way…
Ashleigh waited until Rodney worked up the courage to kiss her and touch her breasts before she made her escape.
"I'm…I'm sorry, Rodney. You know I just can't do that, not yet."
"No, God, Ashleigh! I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking! I mean I was thinking but… Look, I won't do it again, please don't leave!"
"No, I have to go. It's okay…" She faked a shuddery sigh. "Good night." She waved a hand over the motion sensor and fled through the door when it opened.
*~*~*~*~*~
Rodney was a child again, sitting at the piano while his mother glared down at him. Only it wasn't his mother, it was Ashleigh and she was shaking her head at him.
"You just can't play it right can you? You know I can't love you if you can't play it right."
And his child-sized hands couldn't reach the right notes on a keyboard that was suddenly twice normal size. But he tried. Again and again he tried to play the song and each time the keys changed size. Sometimes even as he reached for the key, it would shrink from his fingers.
His mother/Ashleigh stood to the side and shook her head at his efforts. "I only want what's best for you, Meredith. I'm doing this out of love." A switch appeared in her hand and she began swatting his fingers with it whenever he missed a note. The keys were actively evading his fingers now and no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't make the notes, couldn't make her love him.
The tears ran down his cheeks.
He was suddenly aware of another presence in the room and turned his head to see Carson standing there.
"Why d'you never play for me, Rodney?" The soft question was the last thing he heard before he woke in a cold sweat.
Pairing: Beckett/McKay, McKay/OFC
Rating: NC-17 (this chapter)
Warning: adult themes
summary: Carson fantasizes, Ashleigh schemes and Rodney dreams.
Carson pushed the stool back from the counter and stood to peer into the microscope again. The sample he was looking at blurred and he started to adjust the scope before he realized it wasn't the equipment that was causing it, it was his eyes.
Damn, he was tired. He curled a foot around the leg of the stool and drew it close to the counter again so that he could slump onto it. His elbows dropped to the glossy black surface and his face dropped into his hands.
For a moment he considered telling Elizabeth that he couldn't do this anymore. No more work on a retro-virus, no more using his gene-therapy as a bartering tool. No more using the work of his hands to give as tools to men with only their own interests at heart.
He'd wanted to make things better! That's why he went into medicine, what his lifework was supposed to be about. Instead, a whole planet was dead and a tyrant had nearly gained control of another - because of his gene research.
And now, now Elizabeth wanted him to find a way to turn Wraith into humans. He wished bitterly he had never suggested that it might be possible. The possibility of it all going horribly wrong loomed and he knew in his bones that somehow, even if he made it work, even if he could turn Wraith into humans, it would come back to bite them all in the ass.
A deep sigh worked its way up. Definitely time to call it a day. It took him a few seconds to back-up his research notes and close down the computer. A spare thought dimmed the lights and locked the door as he left for his quarters. He should eat, but the way his stomach tightened at the thought convinced him not to try.
It would be nice, he thought, to have someone waiting for him in his quarters. Someone he could go home to, talk to about his worries. He was a bit old to be wishing for his mother, but the longing to be comforted was overwhelming.
His quarters were dark and seemed a little cold, though he knew it was no chillier there than anywhere else in the city. He peeled off the lab coat and slipped out of his shoes. It was really too much effort to undress at the moment and he flopped back on the bed still fully clothed.
It'd be nice if Rodney would stop by. If anyone would understand how he felt, it would be Rodney. A man who had built a bomb only to have his best friend use it on a suicide run would have some inkling of how he felt. Though that wasn't all of it, was it?
There was something comforting about the man's presence. Something that drew him and made him want to seek him out. Ah hell, there was more to it than that, might as well admit it. That crooked smile and the rarely-heard laugh made him feel happy. He missed the man, wanted to be around him, wanted more than that, but never dared to let it show.
It was confusing. Before Cadman had hijacked Rodney's body for that kiss, Carson had entertained only passing curiosity about other men. Now, the idea had been planted. The force behind the kiss had been female, but the hands that had grabbed his lapels and held him still had been male, the chest he bumped against had been breastless, the lips were firm and strong and the smell had been pure Rodney. The idea of a partner who was stronger and solid and could shelter him, make him feel protected -- that was inviting.
The thought of it made his groin twitch and he began to harden. He pictured the kiss in his head again, imagined them standing in his room instead of the lab, alone.
Rodney would pull him close by his shirt, then slide one hand around to cup his neck before kissing him. Those firm lips would nibble and tease his into opening, then that clever tongue would swoop in and take control of his mouth.
As Carson's fantasy evolved, he slid one hand into his pants while using the other to open the button and zipper. His cock popped free of the cloth and he started a slow slide up and down.
Rodney would move his mouth down, nibbling his ear and neck. Carson would be held in strong arms that would wrap around his shoulders before moving down to grab his ass, pressing his erection against the other. That would feel good, he was sure.
After kissing him thoroughly, Rodney would turn him, make Carson lean back against him and start nuzzling that sensitive spot at the nape. The spot that made him shiver in response. Rodney's deft hands would undo his pants and let them drop so that he could release his aching flesh.
There, leaning against that firm chest, between Rodney's strong legs, Carson would let him touch him, let him stroke his cock and cup his scrotum, feel his breath against his neck.
The fantasy allowed Carson to imagine that it was not his own hands bringing him to completion, not his own fingers sweeping down to tease his anus. In his mind, Rodney stroked and touched, and the orgasm, when it hit, left him weak and nearly in tears.
He levered himself up to look at the mess on his shirt. It would never happen. Rodney had his lady now, and no time for his friends. The ache in his chest deepened at the thought.
Mechanically, he stripped off the slimy shirt and stood to let the pants fall free. He stepped out of the puddle of cloth and moved toward where his lab coat lay. There was something there that could help him, at least allow him to fall asleep.
Mentally, he set the device for 3 minutes, upping the intensity level a little and sat back on the bed before telling it to start.
~*~*~*~
Ashleigh knew that soon she'd have to sleep with Rodney. She was frankly amazed that he hadn't pushed her for it more. It was a good thing that the man was so touch-starved that he had settled for kisses and soft words for this long. And needy! God, the man practically begged for the littlest bit of affection. No spine at all, which was sad, so she guessed she shouldn't be surprised that he wasn't being more forward.
Thankfully, there were some real men around who could give her what she wanted. Oh, she liked her control, yes, even got off on it a bit. That sense of power over someone who had authority made her hot. But there was something to be said for a man you could respect ravishing you, taking you hard and fast.
Something she was willing to bet that this sad little man holding her would never give her. They were on the bed, solely because there was no other furniture in the room. He leaned against the wall and she leaned against him. She could feel his fingers ghosting down her arm and back up, his lips nuzzling her hair. His other hand was holding one of hers, fingers twined together. It was all so… sweet. Sappy even. If he were a real man, he would have already pinned her to the bed and gotten her clothes off.
Still, he was malleable this way. She could pretty much get him to do whatever she wanted at these times, so she supposed it was worth the tedium.
"Honey, I heard about what happened on the mission…" she spoke softly.
"Hmm? What do you mean?"
"You were trapped underground and nearly got killed!" She sat up and looked at him, let her eyes well up with unshed tears. "I nearly lost you today!"
"Huh? Well, that was… that was nothing, really. Part of the job, you know."
It was all she could do not to roll her eyes, so she ducked her head down. This guy was pathetic. Still, he was necessary to her plan, so she had to keep him alive and that meant…
"Rodney, why do you even have to go on these missions? You're too important to m-- to the city to risk that way!"
"Well, yes, but it is necessary. There simply isn't anyone else."
Mentally, she sighed and gave up. Her plan required her to control this man and if he wasn't in the city, she couldn't. Worse yet, if he actually died on one of those missions, she would have to start over on someone else. Luckily, she had a Plan B. Sheppard. The man was nowhere near smart enough to get out of her trap, now that she had the means to control him, too. And once she got Weir out of her way…
Ashleigh waited until Rodney worked up the courage to kiss her and touch her breasts before she made her escape.
"I'm…I'm sorry, Rodney. You know I just can't do that, not yet."
"No, God, Ashleigh! I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking! I mean I was thinking but… Look, I won't do it again, please don't leave!"
"No, I have to go. It's okay…" She faked a shuddery sigh. "Good night." She waved a hand over the motion sensor and fled through the door when it opened.
*~*~*~*~*~
Rodney was a child again, sitting at the piano while his mother glared down at him. Only it wasn't his mother, it was Ashleigh and she was shaking her head at him.
"You just can't play it right can you? You know I can't love you if you can't play it right."
And his child-sized hands couldn't reach the right notes on a keyboard that was suddenly twice normal size. But he tried. Again and again he tried to play the song and each time the keys changed size. Sometimes even as he reached for the key, it would shrink from his fingers.
His mother/Ashleigh stood to the side and shook her head at his efforts. "I only want what's best for you, Meredith. I'm doing this out of love." A switch appeared in her hand and she began swatting his fingers with it whenever he missed a note. The keys were actively evading his fingers now and no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't make the notes, couldn't make her love him.
The tears ran down his cheeks.
He was suddenly aware of another presence in the room and turned his head to see Carson standing there.
"Why d'you never play for me, Rodney?" The soft question was the last thing he heard before he woke in a cold sweat.