feeding the body and mind
pretty tired, and i think there are two reasons for that - having a bush walk today which was incredibly hot and sunny, and eating too much for dinner. I had cooked a big pot of mince, carrots, tomatoes, onions, garlic on Thursday and it had lasted me until today, which is 4 meals, and is on the verge of too long in the fridge (though i always heat it up thoroughly) so although it could have been two meals or perhaps a meal and a half, i finished it. had it on a bed of boiled potato and raw baby spinach. yum! i splurged at the bakery on friday for desserts for the weekend, partly because its the weekend before my most stressful week at work, though quite a big part of the reason was that i was waiting ages for the ATM and the bakery happened to be there! i wandered in and thought ok i'll treat myself and then i felt bad just buying one item so i bought another. oh well. bakeries are not cheap! i had a slice of bavarian apple cake last night and tonight (or tomorrow night if i remain this full) i have a custard tart. yum.
yesterday i stayed at home and relaxed and it was a hugely hot day so i did some washing, vacuumed my room, changed and washed the sheets, which is my Sat routine by now. i quite like having a routine for cleaning and washing, cos then i don't have to work out which is the best day to do it, and it's fixed. we don't even have fixed routines for cleaning or washing at home! but here i do. it gives a little structure to my week, since i'm missing my husband whose collaboration usually produces some kind of structure to the week normally. did some work too. and walked to j'ville to buy groceries and visit the bank (and was waylaid by the bakery).
today i went to church with S and it was really interesting. M gave a sermon involving themes picked from several books and Bible verses. it was about Christians being rich, and middle class, and no longer going out to reach towards the marginalised, that Jesus used to do. And the verses were somewhat "radical" ones, like giving a banquet for the poor and homeless, is that literal? (i think so) and the rich young man who asked how to gain eternal life and was told to sell up and give to the poor and follow Jesus and he went away sad cos he was too rich, and the sheep being separated from the goats, depending on whether they gave food to the hungry, a drink to the thirsty, clothes to the naked and visited those who were sick or in prison and Jesus said whenever they did that to "one of the least of these" they did it to Him.
then i went into town and who did I meet but "one of the least of these". i was sitting alone on a bench waiting for my friend. a drunk man was singing and carrying on and lay down to sleep on the street. then he got up after a while and came and sat next to me. remembering what we had discussed just this morning i spoke to him nicely, with respect and without negativity. we chatted awhile, about where we were from, introduced ourselves etc, and shook hands. (i remember the friendliness of drunkenness). after awhile he asked me for some money and i hesitated and finally said i didn't think i could help him. i was struggling because as he later said, he wanted some dollars to buy a beer, he said he needed a beer. i tried to steer the conversation to did he live around here, so i could suggest he went home to rest, cos he looked like he really needed some sleep and food perhaps. if he'd asked me for money for food i would have said yup let's go get you a sandwich. but he said he was going to get a beer. so i said i didn't think i could help him and eventually he said he would try asking someone else, and i said ok, and my friend arrived so we left for lunch.
is it my place to judge what he uses the money for, knowing he needs it? does this count as "needing" money? does he "need" a beer the way a hungry person needs food? i don't know. i came home and shared this with both P and S to see what they thought or what they would have done. P said he would also have bought the man food but not given him money for beer while S didn't have any concrete suggestions. P asked if a man in a burning house wanted some kerosene, should we give it to him cos he wanted it? is that analagous?
i might pose this question to my old BS group and current home group and see what they think, what they would have done. on my part, i felt i did right speaking to him like to any other person, not judging him, but then in my heart i was gradually afraid that if i steered the conversation too much or tried to make suggestions of what he did need, he might get upset and possibly aggressive. but i didn't treat him like he was going to be aggressive at all, didn't draw away, shook his hand when he offered it twice, looked him in the eye, didn't move away until my friend came. i wasn't afraid of him, only thought he *might* get upset, which was a possibility same as anyone. i could have offered a meal instead but i didn't. did i lack courage? i don't know. it's not the money, so maybe i just wasn't confident enough to do as Jesus would have, which i guess is to say "You don't need a beer, come let's go and get something to eat together". I don't think my friend would have been very thrilled at that though.
Any thoughts?
After that we went for a walk in the bush and it was beautiful, plus a proper uphill climb that left us both slightly puffed. I felt I got a proper workout, which is good. A good use of a beautiful Sunday.
Tomorrow, starts another week that will zoom by. The only difference is I can't let this one go by without achieving what I need to do. There's going to be a lot, a lot of prayer, and I know a lot of prayer will be answered too.
10 days to go!
yesterday i stayed at home and relaxed and it was a hugely hot day so i did some washing, vacuumed my room, changed and washed the sheets, which is my Sat routine by now. i quite like having a routine for cleaning and washing, cos then i don't have to work out which is the best day to do it, and it's fixed. we don't even have fixed routines for cleaning or washing at home! but here i do. it gives a little structure to my week, since i'm missing my husband whose collaboration usually produces some kind of structure to the week normally. did some work too. and walked to j'ville to buy groceries and visit the bank (and was waylaid by the bakery).
today i went to church with S and it was really interesting. M gave a sermon involving themes picked from several books and Bible verses. it was about Christians being rich, and middle class, and no longer going out to reach towards the marginalised, that Jesus used to do. And the verses were somewhat "radical" ones, like giving a banquet for the poor and homeless, is that literal? (i think so) and the rich young man who asked how to gain eternal life and was told to sell up and give to the poor and follow Jesus and he went away sad cos he was too rich, and the sheep being separated from the goats, depending on whether they gave food to the hungry, a drink to the thirsty, clothes to the naked and visited those who were sick or in prison and Jesus said whenever they did that to "one of the least of these" they did it to Him.
then i went into town and who did I meet but "one of the least of these". i was sitting alone on a bench waiting for my friend. a drunk man was singing and carrying on and lay down to sleep on the street. then he got up after a while and came and sat next to me. remembering what we had discussed just this morning i spoke to him nicely, with respect and without negativity. we chatted awhile, about where we were from, introduced ourselves etc, and shook hands. (i remember the friendliness of drunkenness). after awhile he asked me for some money and i hesitated and finally said i didn't think i could help him. i was struggling because as he later said, he wanted some dollars to buy a beer, he said he needed a beer. i tried to steer the conversation to did he live around here, so i could suggest he went home to rest, cos he looked like he really needed some sleep and food perhaps. if he'd asked me for money for food i would have said yup let's go get you a sandwich. but he said he was going to get a beer. so i said i didn't think i could help him and eventually he said he would try asking someone else, and i said ok, and my friend arrived so we left for lunch.
is it my place to judge what he uses the money for, knowing he needs it? does this count as "needing" money? does he "need" a beer the way a hungry person needs food? i don't know. i came home and shared this with both P and S to see what they thought or what they would have done. P said he would also have bought the man food but not given him money for beer while S didn't have any concrete suggestions. P asked if a man in a burning house wanted some kerosene, should we give it to him cos he wanted it? is that analagous?
i might pose this question to my old BS group and current home group and see what they think, what they would have done. on my part, i felt i did right speaking to him like to any other person, not judging him, but then in my heart i was gradually afraid that if i steered the conversation too much or tried to make suggestions of what he did need, he might get upset and possibly aggressive. but i didn't treat him like he was going to be aggressive at all, didn't draw away, shook his hand when he offered it twice, looked him in the eye, didn't move away until my friend came. i wasn't afraid of him, only thought he *might* get upset, which was a possibility same as anyone. i could have offered a meal instead but i didn't. did i lack courage? i don't know. it's not the money, so maybe i just wasn't confident enough to do as Jesus would have, which i guess is to say "You don't need a beer, come let's go and get something to eat together". I don't think my friend would have been very thrilled at that though.
Any thoughts?
After that we went for a walk in the bush and it was beautiful, plus a proper uphill climb that left us both slightly puffed. I felt I got a proper workout, which is good. A good use of a beautiful Sunday.
Tomorrow, starts another week that will zoom by. The only difference is I can't let this one go by without achieving what I need to do. There's going to be a lot, a lot of prayer, and I know a lot of prayer will be answered too.
10 days to go!