A whole new world of pain awaits....
Well, I've had a couple days to relax and I've come to the conclusion that I'm just not going to relax for a while...I tried a few different methods for just chillin out and nothing helps. It's like he is pervading my thoughts, I don't even feel at home in my own skin...it's like he physically took part of me away, or maybe added something to me, that makes me not entirely Tina anymore.
At the prosecuter's office we discussed whether or not they would pick up the rape charge; they declined it for a period of 30 days, so the police could have a chance to gather further evidence. One of the reasons it was declined, a major reason actually, was that I didn't report it at the same time as I did the domestic violence. Of course, when I reported it I only reported what my mom knew about and forced me to tell...I was afraid of doing that much, there's no WAY I was about to volunteer info. You'd be afraid though too, if you were me; even the POLICE and PROSECUTOR admitted that his family was something to fear. The police wouldn't approach the house with anyone awake and the prosecutor knew the rather violent history of his family. Um, yeah...so that kind of hampers my case. Meanwhile, the dick-head officer who took my account of the incident NEGLECTED to report the damage done to the bathroom, so there is MORE shit wrong with my case....I knew I didn't like that man for a reason. Well, that reason and that he tried to dismiss it as rape because (after saying just plain NO) I said "No, we can't do this in my mama's house." Somehow, saying no that way made it less of a rape in his opinion, despite the fact that he threatened me for not undressing as he'd told me to and he physically FORCED me into a suitable position...oh well, men are assholes.
My oldest sister bought me a can of pepper spray today. I am to carry it with me at all times. Oh joy.
In other news I am not feeling quite right (physically) and am going to have to go to a clinic if I don't get better soon. That bastard beat and raped me...I swear to GOD if he gave me anything I will hunt him down and make him PAY. Do you know how many STD's cause sterilization? Uh, only most of them...yeah, so if he took that from me too he will have a whole new world of pain in store for him.
At the prosecuter's office we discussed whether or not they would pick up the rape charge; they declined it for a period of 30 days, so the police could have a chance to gather further evidence. One of the reasons it was declined, a major reason actually, was that I didn't report it at the same time as I did the domestic violence. Of course, when I reported it I only reported what my mom knew about and forced me to tell...I was afraid of doing that much, there's no WAY I was about to volunteer info. You'd be afraid though too, if you were me; even the POLICE and PROSECUTOR admitted that his family was something to fear. The police wouldn't approach the house with anyone awake and the prosecutor knew the rather violent history of his family. Um, yeah...so that kind of hampers my case. Meanwhile, the dick-head officer who took my account of the incident NEGLECTED to report the damage done to the bathroom, so there is MORE shit wrong with my case....I knew I didn't like that man for a reason. Well, that reason and that he tried to dismiss it as rape because (after saying just plain NO) I said "No, we can't do this in my mama's house." Somehow, saying no that way made it less of a rape in his opinion, despite the fact that he threatened me for not undressing as he'd told me to and he physically FORCED me into a suitable position...oh well, men are assholes.
My oldest sister bought me a can of pepper spray today. I am to carry it with me at all times. Oh joy.
In other news I am not feeling quite right (physically) and am going to have to go to a clinic if I don't get better soon. That bastard beat and raped me...I swear to GOD if he gave me anything I will hunt him down and make him PAY. Do you know how many STD's cause sterilization? Uh, only most of them...yeah, so if he took that from me too he will have a whole new world of pain in store for him.