can't catch a break

Jun 24, 2010 20:43

First off, I want to say thank you. Yesterday I was feeling kind of...emotionally ambiguous, and I didn't know what to do with myself. I was able to get some rest and I'm feeling better. Whenever I get like that, it's easy for me to forget that I do have support, so I just wanted you guys to know it means the world to me. Thank you.

Suffice it to say, real life has really been kicking my ass these pass two weeks, and I'm doing my best to roll with the punches. And my financial aid package arriving in the mail has done nothing to help it. Adding up the grants and loans, my award total comes out to be $37,050, which sounds like a lot, if my tuition wasn't $37,058. Despite my awards, I still have to pay money. This wouldn't have even been an issue if my scholarship still held, but that was only for four years, and I spending an extra semester at Pace. It's enough to make me want to kick myself.

Creatively, I've been more inspired than I have been in a while. There are so many things that I want to work on, the moodtheme, icons, and even making clothes for Second Life. Despite that, I just can't work up will to actually do anything. I'm sure it won't last for long, it's just annoying.

Right now though, I'm feeling kinda awesome - I'm currently watching a Law and Order: Criminal Intent marathon, and it's an episode with Detective Robert Goren in it, which makes me extremely happy. I couldn't even explain why, but I am infatuated with him - he's such a great character. Just seeing him on-screen makes me smile. And Vincent D'Onofrio happens to be a very attractive man. But aldhfhskdf it's so embarrassing - I've never been so enamored with an actor before ///

I've also been on a Goren/Eames kick lately - I've got about 10 tabs open with fanfic I'm planning on reading OTL

watch me flail, friends: ilu gaiz, random

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