Makin' Movies Makin' Music and Fighting Round the World
The School Year begins, and so sets in insomnia. Instead of studying or perhaps doing some homework, I decided to do something I haven't done in a long long long time. So I blow of the cobwebs of my livejournal and set to typing.
I've been pretty lazy this summer. I worked two jobs and had two classes. Besides moving into an apartment, gaining a few pounds, discovering all sorts of new things about my body, and writting an epic peom about my trip from the couch to the bathroom, this summer has been pretty uneventful. I haven't had many fights with my roommates. We are a tight-knit white-bread family. Dustin is kinda like the dad, he makes the most money, buys the most stuff, leaves a manly stink in the bathroom, and as far as I can tell has the most body hair. Aaron is the mom; he nags the most, obsesses over cleaning, smells nice, and is practically hairless. I guess that makes me either the wayward teenager or the dead-beat brother-in-law. However, I am slowly leaving my scent around the house and establishing dominance. I figure if I pee on the couch a few more times and attack Dustin I might just become the new alpha male...MEH!
Aaron: I'm tired of cleaning up after you ungrateful men, I'm going home to mother!
Dustin: Hey guys, I bought a DVD entitled "100 years of Fecaphilia," wanna watch it with me?
Me: Anyone seen my boxers? I think I left them in the kitchen.
Aaron: None of you respect me, when was the last time you took me out to the movies or told me my hair looks nice?
Dustin: Can I lick your nipples?
Me: This apartment is dirty, let's buy a new one.
Aaron: I'm leaving, Ramon is a much better life-partner for me. He listens to me and understands.
Dustin: Can I at least have a goodbye assfuck?
Me: Hey, they make adult diapers so that you don't even have to walk to the bathroom.
That's pretty much a basic dialogue in the house.
I have have decided to start my very own advice column here on this livejournal. So if you want to recieve my divine wisdom, just leave a question for me and I will respond with the alacrity of a German.
I've been pretty lazy this summer. I worked two jobs and had two classes. Besides moving into an apartment, gaining a few pounds, discovering all sorts of new things about my body, and writting an epic peom about my trip from the couch to the bathroom, this summer has been pretty uneventful. I haven't had many fights with my roommates. We are a tight-knit white-bread family. Dustin is kinda like the dad, he makes the most money, buys the most stuff, leaves a manly stink in the bathroom, and as far as I can tell has the most body hair. Aaron is the mom; he nags the most, obsesses over cleaning, smells nice, and is practically hairless. I guess that makes me either the wayward teenager or the dead-beat brother-in-law. However, I am slowly leaving my scent around the house and establishing dominance. I figure if I pee on the couch a few more times and attack Dustin I might just become the new alpha male...MEH!
Aaron: I'm tired of cleaning up after you ungrateful men, I'm going home to mother!
Dustin: Hey guys, I bought a DVD entitled "100 years of Fecaphilia," wanna watch it with me?
Me: Anyone seen my boxers? I think I left them in the kitchen.
Aaron: None of you respect me, when was the last time you took me out to the movies or told me my hair looks nice?
Dustin: Can I lick your nipples?
Me: This apartment is dirty, let's buy a new one.
Aaron: I'm leaving, Ramon is a much better life-partner for me. He listens to me and understands.
Dustin: Can I at least have a goodbye assfuck?
Me: Hey, they make adult diapers so that you don't even have to walk to the bathroom.
That's pretty much a basic dialogue in the house.
I have have decided to start my very own advice column here on this livejournal. So if you want to recieve my divine wisdom, just leave a question for me and I will respond with the alacrity of a German.