Alright... Well here is my end of this situation. I decided from the very beginning, on a certain principle that I was going for, to make my journal and all posts in it completely open to everyone to read. I honestly had no idea that you all would still read my journal, though I guess that doesn't change much. And I've been checking all of yours since Sean's post in mine, don't ask me why. Morbid curiosity I guess. You have a lot of friends who are involved in the situation to talk to, Jessica. The only friends I have that even know your names are Ben and Keven. I mean I have other people to talk to about it, but I don't exactly have the same circle-jerk crew that you do. So I talk to my journal instead, and I let my relationships with people -around- me be life-affirming and not weighed down by this negativity. I was very angry and hurt about all of this obviously, but I decided it was so ludicrous that I would just move on. I know I was wrong in a lot of ways. I know I did some horrible things up there. I see my mistakes. But your responses were less than rational. (I am thankful, as they allowed me to see a lot about myself and change things.) You all continue on in this arrogant circle-jerk and are blind to your own mistakes and faults. And I'm through feeling guilty for anything in the past, in favor of making a better future. The posts in my journal are nothing more than getting everything -out.- Which is what you did in that long post, what Nick did in several of his, what Kevin did... I hope I wasn't misconstrued. I don't care if you post in your journals about me. I really don't. Nothing is really an insult because I either know that it's not true and thus I don't care, or it -is- true, and I'm working to change it, thanks for the truths. Post all you want. You all have a right to express your feelings. What -I- had the problem with was the usage of full names, and your weird little... evil plan type things. I mean honestly. And I'm childish? Don't you have better things to do with your time and energy? That's my piece on that. I -will- continue to post as I see fit, and in the spirit of my journal, all posts will be open. They're just me, and if you don't care about me, you shouldn't take offense. You don't have to read them. Or maybe you -should- read and understand where I'm coming from too. I am a human being you know, with subjectivity of my own. I'm not static, nor am I simply some -thing- to 'discard' as you put it. You might do well to realize that. It's almost all through anyway... I mean in all honesty, it's mostly out of my system by this point. The post that Sean commented on was fairly old. I just had to get certain things out, or they'd fester. That's all. ~Shrugs~ As I said, I'm not the one who enacted this completely cutting off, rather than working through things. This was done -to- me, and in your view -because- of me, but not -by- me. And I will speak what I feel on the matter, but I will do nothing to harm any of you in any way, nor will I ever use full names. So that's that. I'm not duct-taping you to a chair and forcing you to read.
I decided from the very beginning, on a certain principle that I was going for, to make my journal and all posts in it completely open to everyone to read.
I honestly had no idea that you all would still read my journal, though I guess that doesn't change much. And I've been checking all of yours since Sean's post in mine, don't ask me why. Morbid curiosity I guess.
You have a lot of friends who are involved in the situation to talk to, Jessica. The only friends I have that even know your names are Ben and Keven. I mean I have other people to talk to about it, but I don't exactly have the same circle-jerk crew that you do. So I talk to my journal instead, and I let my relationships with people -around- me be life-affirming and not weighed down by this negativity.
I was very angry and hurt about all of this obviously, but I decided it was so ludicrous that I would just move on. I know I was wrong in a lot of ways. I know I did some horrible things up there. I see my mistakes. But your responses were less than rational. (I am thankful, as they allowed me to see a lot about myself and change things.) You all continue on in this arrogant circle-jerk and are blind to your own mistakes and faults. And I'm through feeling guilty for anything in the past, in favor of making a better future. The posts in my journal are nothing more than getting everything -out.- Which is what you did in that long post, what Nick did in several of his, what Kevin did...
I hope I wasn't misconstrued. I don't care if you post in your journals about me. I really don't. Nothing is really an insult because I either know that it's not true and thus I don't care, or it -is- true, and I'm working to change it, thanks for the truths. Post all you want. You all have a right to express your feelings. What -I- had the problem with was the usage of full names, and your weird little... evil plan type things. I mean honestly. And I'm childish? Don't you have better things to do with your time and energy? That's my piece on that.
I -will- continue to post as I see fit, and in the spirit of my journal, all posts will be open. They're just me, and if you don't care about me, you shouldn't take offense. You don't have to read them. Or maybe you -should- read and understand where I'm coming from too. I am a human being you know, with subjectivity of my own. I'm not static, nor am I simply some -thing- to 'discard' as you put it. You might do well to realize that.
It's almost all through anyway... I mean in all honesty, it's mostly out of my system by this point. The post that Sean commented on was fairly old. I just had to get certain things out, or they'd fester. That's all. ~Shrugs~ As I said, I'm not the one who enacted this completely cutting off, rather than working through things. This was done -to- me, and in your view -because- of me, but not -by- me.
And I will speak what I feel on the matter, but I will do nothing to harm any of you in any way, nor will I ever use full names. So that's that. I'm not duct-taping you to a chair and forcing you to read.
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