(no subject)
First week of the last year of high school. Bizarre, sad, and nostalgic. The senior assembly was weird, because I remember when it was freshman year at the assembly and thinking about what it would be like at the senior one but writing it off cause it wouldn't be for forever. I was wrong, cause it's gone by so quickly, and that makes me really uncomfortable. When I was in elementary school, every grade was very clearly defined, completely separate phases. High school has been different, and I feel as though it's been one big, long but short, run. I think about everything that's happened, and I get sad thinking about how different things are now then from part the time I've been in school. I think mostly about how much I've fucked up so badly so many times, and the times before that, and I get sad thinking about it, and scared because in a weird way, even though I haven't enjoyed my time in high school, (Putting it nicely), I almost wish that I and everyone I go to school with could just be kind of suspended in time, because no matter how much high school has disappointed me and made me hate people at times, it's not as bad or as scary as moving on to things like college and a career and actually starting to live.