Just a Nobody that can feel Pain.
It hurt. She’d never felt pain like this.
She knew that he’d been with other girls. She knew that he’d dated. She didn’t mind it. It was to be expected.
What she didn’t expect though, was the raw pain she felt upon hearing who he was with now. It felt like a real, personal blow. Anyone else, and she could have dealt with it. But, why her?
After all, how could she ever compete with Kairi?
She didn’t feel anything at first after he told her. It was like she’d frozen as she took the information in. That was probably a good thing. It gave her the chance to keep that composed mask in place long enough to get away from him, because she knew it wouldn’t last. She ran to the only place she knew that he wouldn’t be able to find her. She was one of the only people who could truly navigate it anyway, since it was the place she was “born”.
She could hide here, deep within Castle Oblivion.
It gave her time to think. Though she didn’t really want to. She didn’t want to think, and she didn’t want to feel. She missed the numbing void that she used to be able to retreat to before she got her heart.
Kairi. She was everything she wasn’t, and everything she could never be. And he chose her. After all this time, how her feelings for him have grown, after all the hints she’d thrown him, purposely or subconsciously, she’d thought that he was just oblivious. Maybe he just wasn’t interested. He’d prefer Kairi.
She was only here because of Kairi, because she’d lost her heart. She was like a parasite, leeching off of Kairi’s existence. Even after getting a heart of her own, she was still never supposed to exist. And she could still never compete with the real thing. Compared to Kairi, she was still Nothing.
How could she compete with that.