(no subject)
the place makes my eyes burn.
but i dont notice until ive gone home.
and years ago i remember when home was a place where a friend i once thought was my soul mate kept wild turkey on the bookshelves. id come back from the day and settle there with an open cap, open mouth and open the floodgates in my fingertips with that drink. and it felt real, like it penetrated deep into the long lost portions of my psyche that held secrets to entire being if i could just write them down, unfiltered. but now, a version of that same influence does nothing for me but summon a superficial me. superficial as memories.
i want the far away to hold onto. the far away to heal. like some ritualistic far away part of me has trained me to long for. and its still far away..
sometimes getting farther.
how did i pass up the chance to hop trains with those kids when i was seventeen? thats right a degree weight out heavier in the end. and now im broke. and i never tried anything brave like that. i just want things that are far way. and dont go for them.
what poetry is there?
i dont know. the parts of my day where i think about you are numb now.
but i dont notice until ive gone home.
and years ago i remember when home was a place where a friend i once thought was my soul mate kept wild turkey on the bookshelves. id come back from the day and settle there with an open cap, open mouth and open the floodgates in my fingertips with that drink. and it felt real, like it penetrated deep into the long lost portions of my psyche that held secrets to entire being if i could just write them down, unfiltered. but now, a version of that same influence does nothing for me but summon a superficial me. superficial as memories.
i want the far away to hold onto. the far away to heal. like some ritualistic far away part of me has trained me to long for. and its still far away..
sometimes getting farther.
how did i pass up the chance to hop trains with those kids when i was seventeen? thats right a degree weight out heavier in the end. and now im broke. and i never tried anything brave like that. i just want things that are far way. and dont go for them.
what poetry is there?
i dont know. the parts of my day where i think about you are numb now.