Season 5's last PR Rundown
Never in my three years of closely following Project Runway, had a collection made me cry. Not sobbing, guffawing and snotting all over the place, but a mist you may call it. A sting of admiration for the hero, a tugging-at-the-heartstrings tear drop. That’s what happened to me as I watched Leanne’s collection go down the runway. I was shocked at myself. There was no way any onions were being cut since I had eaten dinner already. There wasn’t a freak sandstorm in my friend’s apartment. No, it was the line of sea foam green and cream that made me literally go “oh...my…god!”
So yeah I skipped a few-or several episodes of this season, and in those episodes I’ve missed, I utilized the time for my own advantage: sleep. Which actually I think I would have done anyway had I watched those said episodes. Any person in their right mind knew who was gonna make it to Bryant Park from the start (I’m sorry Wesley, you adorable so and so). I wasn’t surprised when I saw Korto and Leanne in the final three. Kenley on the hand can take that cherry red lipstick and fuck off. First of all. I DON’T CARE WHO YOU ARE OR WHO YOU THINK YOU ARE BUT YOU DO NOT, AND I REPEAT, DO NOT TALK TO TIM GUNN LIKE THAT. That was in caps because this is srs bsns people. If the biggest names in fashion are telling you that you’re ripping off of other designers’ ideas, I’m pretty sure they know what they’re talking about. Any one smart would have taken that tacky ass flower out of their head and planted a tree of fashion knowledge. DO YOUR HOMEWORK, DUMMY. And don’t get offended and ticked off just because it’s something you don’t want to hear. I actually wasn’t aware myself that Balenciaga did a hand-painted line, but that doesn’t mean that someone never ever did that before the year 2008. Come on, it’s PAINT. If you decided to put HD tvs on dresses simultaneously broadcasting Project Runway as they were walking down the runway, now THAT would be something to defend but it’s paint. Plain as day PAINT. Asshat.
Korto should have won. There. I said it. Commercial-wise, Korto could go global with her line. Be in Nordstroms across the country by Christmas time. Heidi said it herself when she told Korto that she “…knows how to dress a woman.” Nina said that with her designs she could dress women of many different sizes. HELLO??? BANK! I guess not all designers want to be department store names, but I can see people like myself (shut up, I’m biased) wearing something by Korto a lot easier than trying to fit my big ass into a skirt with pedals. I’d make those pedals into a parachute. I’m not sayin’, I’m just sayin’. I mean she fuckin made 2 dresses in 3 days, and they were stunning. Not one thread hanging, and it would have never crossed your mind that they were quasi rushed through. That’s talent right there.
But I digress, Leanne’s line, like I said before, made me cry. As I saw the booted designers sitting in the audience, it made me think of my favorite little K-Fed wannabe, Keith. I’m sure he was chewing on those stupid bandanas he wore and thinking of hanging himself with his fringed dresses looking at Leanne’s collection. They got on Keith for his layers or whatever, but here is Leanne, using pedals as her staple, and winning. As Nelson on The Simpsons would say, “HA-ha!”
There was a part of me that wondered what kind of fuckery Jarell would have came up with had he did an entire collection. Maybe he’ll be like Daniel Franco and come back again. And again. And again!
What an interesting season huh? Excuse me, lack thereof. Here’s hoping that now there won’t be a move to Lifetime, Bravo will make next season less shiteous. Well I forgot, they’re moving it to L.A. barf.
Carry on loves. Sorry I led you through a rollercoaster of no Rundowns. Prayer circle for a better season next time right?
Dizaz.
Kors: Did you see that Kenley had lipstick on her teeth?
Klum: OMG I know! lulz.