Ever Lived Abroad? The Adaptation Process
I'm studying abroad in Paris right now. I landed yesterday morning, and I haven't been happy since. I realize that it's part of the culture shock. They talked to us about it before we left and gave us all of the warning signs. It isn't the language, and it isn't the people, streets, or roads that have got me down in the dumps.
I feel completely out of my element. I do not feel stable. I am staying in a temporary dorm for about ten days, and during that time I have to look for an apartment. The program through which I was able to come to France held a meeting today, and they gave us a lot of information. I was overwhelmed at one point, and I felt like crying right there in the middle of that room full of study abroad students. All I heard was, "EXPENSIVE, EXPENSIVE, EXPENSIVE!" And all I could think was, "I HAVE NO MONEY, I HAVE NO MONEY, I HAVE NO MONEY!" And this is what started my depression since my first day in Paris, the fact that I'm basically broke in an expensive ass city. I knew Paris was expensive, but I also "knew" that I'd have my scholarship money by the time I came here. I put knew in quotations, because I was wrong.
You see, I have two scholarships set to come in. One is my regular scholarship that I get through FAFSA every school year, and the other is the Study Abroad Scholarship that I applied for through my university. I knew the Study Abroad one wouldn't come in until after I chose my schedule and e-mailed it to my home school. I did not know that that also applied to my regular scholarship. I don't choose my classes until freaking October. Did I mention that I have to find an apartment and move out of where I am now in the next couple of days? Yeah.
I only have about $100 in my bank account, and the money my dad gave to me before I left only amounted to 189 euros. Most of that is now gone due to wasting it on a taxi that ended up taking my friend and I to the wrong place (our fault, not his), buying tickets for the train, eating, and some other stuff that I'm surely forgetting. And in this meeting they kept talking about renting an apartment, making sure to buy a cell phone, making sure to buy this thing called Pass Navigo which is really handy when it comes to taking the train. It keeps you from having to buy tickets each time you want to go somewhere, but you have to pay for it every month. So basically there was a lot of talk about expenses in this meeting, and all I could think about was my utter lack of money.
When it comes to the apartment thing, I will be sharing it with a friend that I came here with, but that doesn't mean much because I still need to pay for half the deposit/half the rent. She knows my situation (she's been going through the culture shock too. She is depressed. She's staying with a family as an Au Pair, and she hates it. And it was only her second day today! Where they put her to stay in the house absolutely sucks. The woman basically wants her to be her bitch. So she's quitting and moving in to my room tomorrow morning).
As for my situation: my dad will be sending me some money this coming weekend, and it's enough that I won't have to think about how much money I don't have every time I set foot outside of my room. I will still need to be stingy though, because I will be saving the bulk of it for in case we find an apartment (we have an appointment tomorrow). I might use some of it to buy the Pass Navigo in order to get train/metro/tramway expenses out of my hair.
If it wasn't for my friend experiencing this with me, I think I would be in a worse emotional state. I've been able to talk to my dad (who's in Haiti), one of my brothers and my sister (who are on Facebook). I have not gotten the opportunity to speak to my mom since I've been here though she's aware of what's going on. I miss my family, and I miss feeling stable. Knowing I have money, knowing how the transportation system works (I had trouble with the RER this morning even though I used it yesterday), being able to call home from my university, having a working cell phone, etc.
I know that what I'm feeling now is part of the adaptation process, so I'm desperately looking forward to it passing and things feeling normal and stable. I hope to come back here in the middle of October, read this, and smile fondly as I remember the state I was in because by that time I will be living in Paris like a pro, with steady money and all.
Have any of you ever lived abroad (from anywhere you are) for a lengthy period of time (where you had to basically get everything you already had at home)? Did you experience culture shock? Which kind and when did it pass?
I feel completely out of my element. I do not feel stable. I am staying in a temporary dorm for about ten days, and during that time I have to look for an apartment. The program through which I was able to come to France held a meeting today, and they gave us a lot of information. I was overwhelmed at one point, and I felt like crying right there in the middle of that room full of study abroad students. All I heard was, "EXPENSIVE, EXPENSIVE, EXPENSIVE!" And all I could think was, "I HAVE NO MONEY, I HAVE NO MONEY, I HAVE NO MONEY!" And this is what started my depression since my first day in Paris, the fact that I'm basically broke in an expensive ass city. I knew Paris was expensive, but I also "knew" that I'd have my scholarship money by the time I came here. I put knew in quotations, because I was wrong.
You see, I have two scholarships set to come in. One is my regular scholarship that I get through FAFSA every school year, and the other is the Study Abroad Scholarship that I applied for through my university. I knew the Study Abroad one wouldn't come in until after I chose my schedule and e-mailed it to my home school. I did not know that that also applied to my regular scholarship. I don't choose my classes until freaking October. Did I mention that I have to find an apartment and move out of where I am now in the next couple of days? Yeah.
I only have about $100 in my bank account, and the money my dad gave to me before I left only amounted to 189 euros. Most of that is now gone due to wasting it on a taxi that ended up taking my friend and I to the wrong place (our fault, not his), buying tickets for the train, eating, and some other stuff that I'm surely forgetting. And in this meeting they kept talking about renting an apartment, making sure to buy a cell phone, making sure to buy this thing called Pass Navigo which is really handy when it comes to taking the train. It keeps you from having to buy tickets each time you want to go somewhere, but you have to pay for it every month. So basically there was a lot of talk about expenses in this meeting, and all I could think about was my utter lack of money.
When it comes to the apartment thing, I will be sharing it with a friend that I came here with, but that doesn't mean much because I still need to pay for half the deposit/half the rent. She knows my situation (she's been going through the culture shock too. She is depressed. She's staying with a family as an Au Pair, and she hates it. And it was only her second day today! Where they put her to stay in the house absolutely sucks. The woman basically wants her to be her bitch. So she's quitting and moving in to my room tomorrow morning).
As for my situation: my dad will be sending me some money this coming weekend, and it's enough that I won't have to think about how much money I don't have every time I set foot outside of my room. I will still need to be stingy though, because I will be saving the bulk of it for in case we find an apartment (we have an appointment tomorrow). I might use some of it to buy the Pass Navigo in order to get train/metro/tramway expenses out of my hair.
If it wasn't for my friend experiencing this with me, I think I would be in a worse emotional state. I've been able to talk to my dad (who's in Haiti), one of my brothers and my sister (who are on Facebook). I have not gotten the opportunity to speak to my mom since I've been here though she's aware of what's going on. I miss my family, and I miss feeling stable. Knowing I have money, knowing how the transportation system works (I had trouble with the RER this morning even though I used it yesterday), being able to call home from my university, having a working cell phone, etc.
I know that what I'm feeling now is part of the adaptation process, so I'm desperately looking forward to it passing and things feeling normal and stable. I hope to come back here in the middle of October, read this, and smile fondly as I remember the state I was in because by that time I will be living in Paris like a pro, with steady money and all.
Have any of you ever lived abroad (from anywhere you are) for a lengthy period of time (where you had to basically get everything you already had at home)? Did you experience culture shock? Which kind and when did it pass?