Writer's Block (a post from ages ago that I never got around to posting)
I have a headache. My laptop screen is giving off an uncomfortable white glow and I can't help but put all my concentration on my eyes still fixated on the empty page. Thus the headache.
There is nothing more excruciating than a blank space. I can't help but stare at it, watching the thin black line on my word processor blink with anticipation, as if to say, "Well, what the hell are you waiting for? I can't wait all day y'know." Even if I have a general idea of what I want to say, I often wonder what I could possibly convey that either hasn't already been said or could be said infinitely better if I had the proper insight or vocabulary. I sometimes find myself reaching for the right word, feeling that I knew it once but that all I can recall of it is a vague and blurry image of what it resembled, like the way one remembers an old friend they haven't seen since they were kids. This happens to me quite frequently and it leaves me feeling inadequate and poorly educated. Especially when I settle for a simpler, less concise word to express my point, which makes me feel unable to fully communicate. Even more so when the word is used inappropriately.
Whenever I start to write I can't help but hear my mother's critical voice in my head saying, "You've got to be kidding me."
It's even worse with art.
Ugh...whatever.
-Z
There is nothing more excruciating than a blank space. I can't help but stare at it, watching the thin black line on my word processor blink with anticipation, as if to say, "Well, what the hell are you waiting for? I can't wait all day y'know." Even if I have a general idea of what I want to say, I often wonder what I could possibly convey that either hasn't already been said or could be said infinitely better if I had the proper insight or vocabulary. I sometimes find myself reaching for the right word, feeling that I knew it once but that all I can recall of it is a vague and blurry image of what it resembled, like the way one remembers an old friend they haven't seen since they were kids. This happens to me quite frequently and it leaves me feeling inadequate and poorly educated. Especially when I settle for a simpler, less concise word to express my point, which makes me feel unable to fully communicate. Even more so when the word is used inappropriately.
Whenever I start to write I can't help but hear my mother's critical voice in my head saying, "You've got to be kidding me."
It's even worse with art.
Ugh...whatever.
-Z