What not to say, road trips, & the pixies
In my what not to say segment: I’ll start out with “gee (insert GF name here, who just picked up a porno mag. in your house) doesn’t that second girl look like the bartender down at (insert local bar name)?”. Be prepared to be swatted about the head with porno mag. Then later that evening as luck would have it, while out drinking i ran into aforementioned ‘tender and receive a nice big friendly hug while the GF looks on and fumes. Follow that sweet one up later in the week with a comment like “ man amputees sure make me hot”. How the hell did I manage to get a double arm amputee to walk up to me later that night and flirt? Don’t ask me I’m just the idiot saying stupid shit. In other angrychef news we hit the Pixies show the other night and good times were had. I made about 125 in tips for 3 hours of work, and a free show. Unfortunately while breakfasting at the D the next day I was talked into a trip to Portland to go to Dante’s SINFERNO CABARET that Sunday night. Not a good plan to say the least. I wasted what cash I made at the pixies, plus what I won at poker later Saturday night on what I can only imagine is the oldest working stripper in Portland. After deciding current company would rather party on with out the chef and i. I called up a long time friend or I should say fiend so we could meet up at the tiger bar. With good ol’ nick cave playing in the background we set out on an odyssey of sin & perversion ourselves. I will not get into too many details here but pharmaceuticals, absinthe, and very old strippers with huge fake boobs played major roles in my nights activities, also a bar shaped like a bum jug called the pirates cove and crashing in an apartment over a jack shack. Being back in bend with no cash or roommate prospects is not so bad after all. Someone shoot me.
