Lonely and Bored
Sigh. Today I bought a digital camera. That made me pretty happy. What made me unhappy was realizing that right now my life is fairly uninteresting and therefore trying to document it in any way would be as well. I work, I spend time with my boyfriend and family. I have about 4 or 5 really good friends. Only one of which lives in town. She has two kids. She cannot usually come out and play. Not by the time I get off work at 9pm that is. There are a few people that have been trying to get to know me and become friends. I have been hesitant. I am untrusting of people. And besides two are guys. I have been with my boyfriend for two years. I love him. I would never cheat on him. But I can count on less than one hand the things we have common. These other guys, however, really inspire me to be creative. They are in band and are very talented. I have decided that what Sedric and I do have in common is what counts. But I am still afraid that being around these other people may make me doubt, or make me try to push him to be something that he is not. What to do. I really cannot keep denying my creative side like this. I know that it is only a matter of time before things fall into place for me. But I am impatient and I long for someone to be excited with, to bounce ideas off of, to call up and say "hey come over and hang out". I guess for now I will just have to settle for the way that things are. Sigh.