This is a bunch of lettering to mean nothing
I cant help but feel the sickness of those around me. I tend to sense, and feel all energy, good and bad. It is really quite amazing, how much can be felt, when you take the mind out of the equation. It is so easy to be happy, when you are able to remove yourself from society.
After a week, a mere 6 days, in Ecuador, I came home, with a new understanding of what feeling really means. What pure existance, without our egos, our expectations, our demands that we give upon ourselves and what society gives upon us. I have been home only 9 hours, and already fallen to disappointment. Disappointment is easy in a society based upon other human beings. Lets face it, human beings are disappointing. It is just really hard for me, and perhaps I am just a naturalist at heart, to find disappointment in nature. To find disappointment in the act of just being.
When I state human beings are disappointing, I only mean it in the way of expectations. We can only get from human interaction, depending on the energy, the situation, etc,etc,etc,etc, but we find that nature is a constant. It exists, and our interpretation and acceptance of it is merely up to each individual.
Today, on my flight from Houston Tx, to New York, I found myself noticing another individual. Attraction of sorts, or perhaps just energy, reguardless, after stumbling into him on the subway, I was able to evoke conversation. It was easy, and quite gratifying, finding a person who seemed to be bouncing through life in a similar fashion. After a good round of conversation, we parted our ways. No exchange of information, no future plans, just a smile and handshake. Some of me wanted to run back after him, without any reservation, and exchange numbers. Some of me wanted to write a "missed connections" on craigslist, or perhaps hangout in the part of town where he said he lived. But none of this is an answer, just merely another wild fantasy of hope, I reguarly dangle in front of my face. The jury is still out on this manner...the mere fantasy vs. the reality of human interaction. I simply am stuck in between both realms, quite realist, but quite fantasy.
I am not sure if I believe in horoscopian tales and theories, but I suppose there is some thought to me being a Gemini. I am rather multipersonality, at least in my inner existance, always fighting between fantasy, feeling, and the mind. BUT, what I have found in this complete bouncing energy is a sort of balance.
I think tonight was the first time I have ever experienced what "nirvana" may be. For the first time, I existed, I felt radiated, despite the burden of disappointment, I completely was there. Mindful of the world, but mindless of my own complications. Maybe it isnt "nirvana" in a sense, but it was a complete feeling of bliss, and quite frankly, ill take it, in this disappointing world. Ill take it, thank you.
After a week, a mere 6 days, in Ecuador, I came home, with a new understanding of what feeling really means. What pure existance, without our egos, our expectations, our demands that we give upon ourselves and what society gives upon us. I have been home only 9 hours, and already fallen to disappointment. Disappointment is easy in a society based upon other human beings. Lets face it, human beings are disappointing. It is just really hard for me, and perhaps I am just a naturalist at heart, to find disappointment in nature. To find disappointment in the act of just being.
When I state human beings are disappointing, I only mean it in the way of expectations. We can only get from human interaction, depending on the energy, the situation, etc,etc,etc,etc, but we find that nature is a constant. It exists, and our interpretation and acceptance of it is merely up to each individual.
Today, on my flight from Houston Tx, to New York, I found myself noticing another individual. Attraction of sorts, or perhaps just energy, reguardless, after stumbling into him on the subway, I was able to evoke conversation. It was easy, and quite gratifying, finding a person who seemed to be bouncing through life in a similar fashion. After a good round of conversation, we parted our ways. No exchange of information, no future plans, just a smile and handshake. Some of me wanted to run back after him, without any reservation, and exchange numbers. Some of me wanted to write a "missed connections" on craigslist, or perhaps hangout in the part of town where he said he lived. But none of this is an answer, just merely another wild fantasy of hope, I reguarly dangle in front of my face. The jury is still out on this manner...the mere fantasy vs. the reality of human interaction. I simply am stuck in between both realms, quite realist, but quite fantasy.
I am not sure if I believe in horoscopian tales and theories, but I suppose there is some thought to me being a Gemini. I am rather multipersonality, at least in my inner existance, always fighting between fantasy, feeling, and the mind. BUT, what I have found in this complete bouncing energy is a sort of balance.
I think tonight was the first time I have ever experienced what "nirvana" may be. For the first time, I existed, I felt radiated, despite the burden of disappointment, I completely was there. Mindful of the world, but mindless of my own complications. Maybe it isnt "nirvana" in a sense, but it was a complete feeling of bliss, and quite frankly, ill take it, in this disappointing world. Ill take it, thank you.