Pondering a new beginning =]
Wow, so I dont even know where to start. I have been a complete lost mess for the past couple years, and I finally got to the point where I didnt even know MYSELF anymore. I got to the point I was doing shit without thinking, and things that even after realising it was not a very good idea I kept repeating them. So terrible, and embarrassing. But I am soo glad for how well I am doing now. =] I am happier by the day, and it's effin awesome. Jon did alot to me since I have known him, and I realised how shitty of a person he truly is and he really won't ever change, cause the problem is with him and I don't think he's strong enough to ever admit or face it. Like who am I kidding, I started to be something I was not to try to impress someone who is going no where with their life anyway! Okay enough about that loser because I am so over talking about him.
I am talking to a couple people right now. Def not looking for anything, but whatever happens, happens! =] I am so excited for how nice it has been out. I have been losing weight and going to the tanner alot. Its awesome!
On the down side, my grandpa is in the hospital, and its not looking very good. At first they thought it may have just been one of his medications and they took him off it. But now I guess they think it may have something to do with his heart and may need to do some minor heart surgery. Of course, the man that he is, "no surgery of any kind." I havent really talked to anyone about it much, probably because I dont want it to be happening and I dont want to face that type of reality at the moment. When it comes to possibly losing someone you love like this permanantly it sets in all the other shit we are over-dramatic about from day to day and makes you not care so much about the things you thought were important, but whats important is living for yourself and making sure u spend time with the ones you care about and when you know u have someone good in your life, not to fuck it up with them because you never know what could happen even tommorrow.
Well I am gonna go finish texting with tony and fall asleep i am very sleepy. night xo
I am talking to a couple people right now. Def not looking for anything, but whatever happens, happens! =] I am so excited for how nice it has been out. I have been losing weight and going to the tanner alot. Its awesome!
On the down side, my grandpa is in the hospital, and its not looking very good. At first they thought it may have just been one of his medications and they took him off it. But now I guess they think it may have something to do with his heart and may need to do some minor heart surgery. Of course, the man that he is, "no surgery of any kind." I havent really talked to anyone about it much, probably because I dont want it to be happening and I dont want to face that type of reality at the moment. When it comes to possibly losing someone you love like this permanantly it sets in all the other shit we are over-dramatic about from day to day and makes you not care so much about the things you thought were important, but whats important is living for yourself and making sure u spend time with the ones you care about and when you know u have someone good in your life, not to fuck it up with them because you never know what could happen even tommorrow.
Well I am gonna go finish texting with tony and fall asleep i am very sleepy. night xo