(no subject)
I'm hanging in there, but just barely. It's okay. It's okay. I tell myself. And usually it is. One day I will be ready to face the world again--but right now I'm not. And I think I'll have to anyway. It's something we both needed to do. But the difference is, she bid her time, and so when it was over she was ready. But I wasn't. I'm not yet. I will be. But I'm not yet. And so, I hide from the world, hopping from place to place. I thought I knew you. I thought you... I always thought that... But you said... She did say it. But I didn't understand what she was saying because it wasn't part of my vocabulary. I don't think it was part of hers yet. She learned to speak, before I could learn to hear. When I learned to hear, she learned to walk. When I walked, she learned to run. And when I could finally run, she's able to fly. And now she's free of me. And I'm actually glad. But I'm not yet free of her. She had a running start, and I need more time. I've spread my wings before I was ready to, and now I'm hanging. Hanging on, but just barely. Maybe I'll try again tomorrow. It hurts, but it's not crushing. I don't know why, but I can't tell what's worse. But...I guess it had to happen.