UGH...
after a very confusing week things just cant be simple now. i have now heard from multiple people that someone once very close to me NOW misses me and is realizing the stupid shit they did. i just want to say it is too late, but something in my heart says i need to listen. i loved this person with my heart and soul, but how can you forgive someone from hurting you so badly? what would justify giving them the time of day? how do i know this isnt going to hurt me more? i have a new philosphy in life and it is to make sure that in between the time of 1 day to 50 years from now i dont have to look back and say i wonder what could have happened. i dont want that to ever happen to me. so i guess i just have to take my chances and hope everything works out for the best. i know that i have someone i can cry to if i need them and i love that. i finally have that again. not only do i have that but also someone who i know will care about me no matter what i do, not to mention the perfect days we have together and the way he treats me i feel like i am number one and hermosa. i just dont want to get hurt by the same person again, would that be considered selfish? i couldnt believe how many tears still poured out of me when i recieved this news. hopefully i will have a wonderful relaxing day at the beach tomorrow with my friends and if i get this phone call i will act on instinct, if i dont, then i will take it as a deffinate sign that i was right, nothing good can come of this. i guess only time will tell....