At least someone cares enough
Some people just dont understand....i try and i try....but its never worth it....i always get kicked in the fucking ass!
- everything i do is wrong
- everything i say makes things worse
- I CANT DO ANYTHING RIGHT!!!
It just hurts soo bad that ive never had someone i can tell EVERYTHING to. Someone i can tell secrets to and them not judging me, someone that can tell me their things and me doing everything in my power to help them, someone that i can be with all the time me at their house or them at my house or just go out together often. Yeah maybe those things are just like those white shows that have parents that let their kids do whatever they want. But ive just always wanted to live my life that way. Yeah i know im pathetic and i have stupid ideas but damn im just really really hurt. Im not trying to make anyone feel bad or anything im tried of not writing how i fucking feel just cuz im afraid of hurting someone but u know what fuck that. Why should i give a fuck when they dont? Its not fair. All my life ive been the "good" friend. The friend that is always there...wheres my "good" friend?
I have one special person in my life that i love soo very much and that i can tell almost everything to him and he wont judge me or anything just listen and try to help me out. That person is Kerbyn, hes my best friend and my boyfriend. Without him i would be shit right now. Hes the only one that has been there for me EVERYTIME ive needed someone. I try to help him also but we need to work on him letting things out because hes not used to it. But im just glad to have at least one person always there trying to make me feel that best. Thank you Kerbyn.