...And Sometimes I Ask...WHY NOT ME????

[angelique5666]

First, Gray has her baby. Then someone I know has just gotten pregnant with her third child, and now my oldest friend in the whole wide world, Danielle, is getting married. This is the same girl who I asked to be my maid of honor in my wedding that was suppose to happen last summer. Don't get me wrong, I adore this girl to death and only wish the best for her and am totally happy for her and her Travis yada yada yada, but all I can think at the same time is WHY NOT ME???? Sometimes I think that I am trying to grow up to fast or that I'm just simply losing my mind (I'm not the girl that I was at 16, and sometimes that scares the living daylights outa me), but goddamnit, it feels like everyone is having their turns at this, why not me? I've been with the same guy for three fucking years, and he wants to wait until we finish college. Don't get me wrong, I see the logic in this idea and agree with it, but yearnings don't listen to logic. It's my id, wanting and screaming for what it wants.

Goddamnit, I sound like a fucking romantic comedy.

But I want that life so bad it hurts sometimes.

I'm so happy for Danielle. I can't wait until the ball gets rolling for her wedding, so that maybe I can help out a little, maybe to get some of this outa my system for a while.