of parenting
I was at the pediatrician last week for Marie’s constipation and an incident I witnessed put much thought about parenting styles. This mother, quite the diva, was a parent of a boy that was misbehaving. Well, basically the child was on the floor thrashing and shouting. The mother calmly placed the magazine she was reading down, then she yelled at her domestic helper for not watching HER SON and this led to his misbehavior.
Hello, did you knock your pretty little head on the floor? That is YOUR child! Take some responsibility and not throw your temper when the fault is yours. Your domestic helper is there to HELP you, not raise and discipline your child. Then she went back to her magazine and sulked at a corner like a kid while her helper played bricks with the boy.
When it was my Marie’s turn, I turned to scoop my bag up and Andrea knocked it over. Oh dear Lord. Biscuits, bottles, bib cloths, water, toys, my mobile, my wallet were strewn all over the floor! I scrambled to pick my things up, Marissa in one arm, yelling at Andrea to help me. I must have looked like a crazed housewife. When I gathered all my things, I glanced at said parent and she gave me an almost pitying look that read “You really need help with those 2 kids.”
I don’t speak well of myself but I’m very proud of the parent I’ve become. I didn’t plan to have either of my girls. But I made a choice. A choice that every parent has to make. You either be a hands-on or hands-off parent.
I can take both my girls out on my own without any help from anyone else. I make an effort to spend quality time with my girls daily. I enjoy doing mundane activities such as bathing, feeding, playing with them. Being working parents, most of us leave our children in the care of family, domestic helpers, childcare centres, they spend their entire day without seeing their parents. If I don’t make the effort to spend quality time with them after work, there’s no foundation for a good parent-child relationship.
I don’t agree with the parenting styles of some mothers I know but who am I to judge? I believe all mothers try to do what’s best for their children.
There’s so much to think about when having children. I wish more people thought about the lives they bring into this world. At the end of the day, I guess the issue is not whether you plan to have your children or conceived them unplanned, but how you choose to raise your children and the kind of parent you choose to become.
On a side note, I simply adore this picture of Marie. She looks so pensive and occupied with gazing out to sea.