what does it mean?
i found out last night that nathan has had at least one girlfriend who lived with him. when he told me that, it bothered me. not only am i jealous of a girl i have never met, and i have only heard him talk about... but it was the fact that he talked about it so flippantly, as if it meant nothing. to me, moving in with someone, and living with them, is a big deal. its the same with a lot of things he's done. to me, they're things that are a big deal, but to him, they seem like nothing... im not exactly sure how i feel about it, but everytime i think about it, my stomach turns in knots. do i really want to be with someone for the rest of my life who thinks so little of things that mean so much to me? i've been doubting myself since the episode this past weekend... if you know about it, great, if you dont, i dont want to repeat it. it hurt a lot and i dont wish to revisit it once again. i dont know how i feel about it though. i love him with all of my heart, but really... can i do it?