Pushing Parks - Chapter 3
Chapter 3
It was the day that she had her biggest fight with her mother when Leslie Knope realized what her power was capable of.
Leslie Knope’s obsession with waffles came from her father. Robert Knope was the best waffle-maker in the whole planet in young Leslie’s mind and while kids her age were dreaming of becoming princesses or getting married when they grew up, Leslie was sure that she would open up her own waffle restaurant. Her dreams came true when she put in every penny she ever saved since she was a teenager and opened up JJ’s Waffle Haus in a small location on one of the busiest streets of Coeur de Pawnee. Yet she still came up short on bills and other payments.
JJ’s Waffle Haus had been open for six months and was already on the verge of bankruptcy. Ann Perkins, the beautiful ex-nurse, was helping Leslie in every way she can, working pro bono and even letting Leslie Knope auction her off just that one time for ‘Win A Date with Beautiful Ex-Nurse, now Waitress but still Beautiful Ann Perkins’ so that the diner could get some revenue.
So Leslie was grateful when her mother Marlene Griggs-Knope told Leslie that she had arranged a meeting for her with a potential investor. Leslie was ready to meet the potential investor at any time at the diner but was surprised when her mother Marlene Griggs-Knope told her that they were going to meet at a fancy restaurant for dinner and advised her to dress nicely.
Leslie was looking forward to her meeting with the potential investor and followed her mother’s instructions and was five minutes early at the restaurant she was to meet the potential investor. She was devastated to realize that her meeting was a date and the potential investor was a 65 year old widower.
Thus happened the biggest fight between the mother-daughter duo and Leslie Knope found herself walking aimlessly in the snow-covered streets of Coeur de Pawnee to calm herself down while hoping that her mother would not try to set her up again with guys older than even her own self. She stopped by a small area in a parking lot where used to be the smallest park in Indiana. After the tourist attraction vanished, the government stopped working on the park and left it to its own fate which was to be abandoned and lost among the cars that surrounded it. Even though the regular obese citizens of Coeur de Pawnee could not fit into the park, Leslie had always loved it.
She sat down on the broken bench in the park with her hands in the pockets of her red coat and closed her eyes. When she opened them, she saw something lying on the ground behind her. Upon closer inspection, she realized that it was rather someone. Scared and shocked, Leslie gripped the bench she was sitting on tightly, unable to move. Her heart was beating faster and faster.
Leslie Knope was unaware of how time moved but two minutes later, two things were different. Firstly, the smallest park was back to how it was first opened: small yet lovely and green. And secondly and more importantly, the dead guy was very much alive and was looking at Leslie. Words were not forming in Leslie Knope’s brain. Yet she was able to see that even though there was a hole where his brain should have been, the once dead guy was saying words to her.
“Why did you bring me back? I wanted it to all end.”
“You killed yourself?” she finally was able to ask.
“Yes, and now I’ll do it again.” the guy said and looked for something on the ground. “What did you do with my gun? Give it back.” he shouted as he got on his feet and launched himself toward Leslie Knope. “Give me my gun back.”
Leslie sprang to her feet as well and tried to fight the guy off. He was holding her arms while still asking for his gun back which Leslie did not have. When she somehow got her arms free, she wrapped them around the guy to demobilize him, a trick she had learned many years ago at one of the community center classes. She had no idea about her powerful that trick would be when the guy fell dead in her arms in the middle of the smallest park in Indiana.
She ran to the nearest pay-phone and called the police, leaving an anonymous tip informing that there was a guy who had killed himself in the smallest park in Indiana. She then ran home and took a long bath, while crying and avoiding the outside world, not even answering her next door neighbor beautiful ex-nurse who was probably visiting to ask about the meeting.
As she soaked herself in the tub, Leslie Knope was upset to think she had just brought someone back to life and then back to death by her touch, that the last time she had sex was with Mark Brendanawicz from whom she had leased JJ’s Waffle Haus when they were both drunk after the opening party of JJ’s Waffle Haus and that her last date had been with a guy who would still be older than her own father if he were alive. Yet now knowing the full extent of her power, she decided that she was no longer the biggest fan of intimacy.
And years later, she was in another park she had just brought back to life, running to the body of Ben Wyatt, kneeling on the spot which was covered in mud and thrash just seconds before. Even though she had known of Ben Wyatt, that was the first time she was being in such a close proximity to Ben Wyatt who was Leslie Knope’s first celebrity crush as the country’s youngest mayor. And the once dead Teen Mayor was pretty much alive, slowly opening her eyes. He got startled upon seeing the Waffle Maker.
“Hi.” she said shyly. Though she was aware of the fact that she was running out of time, she always found it difficult to find the appropriate words to say to a person she had just brought back to life.
“Good lord, what’s happening?” he spoke. His voice was hoarse from lying on thrash, dead for hours.
“I’m Leslie Knope, from JJ’s Waffle Haus. Do you know what is happening to you now?”
“I had the strangest dream. I dreamed I was being strangled with a plastic bag.” Ben Wyatt said as he brought himself to a sitting position.
“You were strangled to death with a plastic bag.” Leslie said in her politest voice.
“Oh.” he gasped. “Where am I?”
“We are in Ramsett Park.” Leslie answered. “I have, well, you have less than two minutes so I’ll be quick. You were dead and I brought you back to life along with the park. Do you know who killed you so we can avenge your death?”
“I have no idea. I was asked to come here and I thought it was dumb to actually come here but I did and then I was strangled to death and then I opened my eyes and was looking at the sun but actually it was your hair.”
Leslie found herself blushing unwillingly. “That’s my shampoo, it makes my hair shinier.” she commented then cleared her throat and went back to business mode. “I’m sorry you got killed. Any last thoughts, wishes?”
Ben got on his feet, looked around, then looked back at Leslie who was standing before him. “I wish I had the courage to sit down at your section at JJ’s Waffle Haus.”
“You went there?” Leslie said.
“Almost every week. You are the Waffle Maker.” Ben replied nervously.
“And you are Benji Wyatt, the Teen Mayor.” she said and looked down at her watch. “We have, well, you have less than a minute left.”
“Thank you Leslie, nobody has called me Benji since… well, since I was impeached. I missed being called that.”
“You were my first lo- my first crush… my first celebrity crush.” Leslie mumbled.
“And you were my last crush.” Ben said in an honest-to-god manner. “I want my first kiss with you to be my last kiss, is that weird?” Ben said as he took a step forward to Leslie.
“No, that’s symmetrical.” Leslie replied shyly, with half a smile. She closed her eyes.
Ben’s minute was nearly over. He closed his eyes and leaned down towards the Waffle Maker. Leslie Knope’s lips went as far as they would go. She couldn’t will them to go any further.
“If you don’t want to kiss me, it’s okay.” Ben suggested as he looked at her.
“I do, I do…” Leslie exclaimed as she pulled away and from under her breath said “What if you didn’t have to be dead?”
“That would be preferable.” Ben Wyatt agreed.
Leslie stopped, looked around, then at her watch. The moment Ben had was already over. She didn’t see any other change in the park or anyone dying.
“Nobody can know. Okay, go hide behind that tree.” she commanded and Ben smiled and followed her instruction. She moved around nervously, making sure there wasn’t anything around that suggested Ben’s existence. She didn’t hear Ron Swanson coming towards her.
“Knope, the park looks amazing.”
“Ah, yes.” she replied sheepishly.
“What happened to the guy? Who killed him?”
“What guy? I’ve never seen a guy, anytime, anywhere. There wasn’t a dead body, there were raccoons. I need to go to the bathroom, the whiz palace as I like to call it and I’ll see you at the Waffle Haus.” she mumbled and ran to the direction of her car.
Ron Swanson watched as a figure moved behind a tree. He grunted and screamed Leslie’s name at the top of his lungs as he saw the figure run towards Leslie’s car.
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AN: Happy new year everyone!!