the sun burns my skin.

[angelic_rage]

this year,
not yet a whole week old.
twenty eleven.
already i feel like i can breathe easier.
already i feel excited.
energized.
and ready.

i look back at the last two weeks,
and i laugh to myself.
what a wild ride this life is.
and i think about when i was 17,
and i wanted to write the book of mel,
and i knew right then,
that i was not yet ready,
there was still so much that was going to happen.
and i laugh to myself once again..
because this is going to be good.

and so i close my eyes,
and try to remember you.
but then i remember,
i dont want to know you.
and i think to myself,
of where i have been,
and i think of where i am going..
the desire to throw my arms up,
to grab hold of the sky,
to sing to the heavens
and praise the light,
and praise the dark..
for i am alive again,
and i am ready to live.
all because,
right then,
at that moment i knew,
that there was nothing more to you.

and i sort of feel like im floating here..
suspended in time,
caught in a cloud of sound and light.
wrapped in the womb of fate.
like i am being guided forward,
and all i need do is keep my head up and smile.
i like this feeling..
because it makes my heart race,
and i am terrified,
yet my hands shake with excitement,
and my fear is coated in glee.
this is going to be everything i want it to be.