sitting here wondering why
As I sit here with tears rolling down my face wondering why. Why do I have to always be hurt. Why Cant I understand all the hurt and pain I go through everyday. There is one person I want to be with and I cant because I have lost all my chances with him. I am sick of being hurt all the time. I am sick of all the pain I let my self get put through. There are only 2 things keeping me around right now. My 2 wonderful daughters and my mom and dad and 2 brothers. I know this one specific person I am talking about knows who he is but u know what I dont honestly care. I am going to leave a comment towards him and a few other people. I have lost all my friends and most of my family has given up on me. I am going to be away from the computer for awhile. I cant deal with the pain anymore. I am not going to call anyone. If people want to talk to me they can leave me an e-mail. or if you got my phone number call me. I dont want to be a bother to certian people so I am going to leave everyone alone. Here goes my comments towards people.
Ian: I am sorry for all the pain I have caused you in the past. I am greatful that we have a wonderful daughter together. I am sorry that I fucked up our relationship. I am sorry we ever met. I am sorry that I fell in love with you. I am sorry that you are the only one that is able to make me happy and will treat me with respect. I am sorry that I cant deal with the fact that you are happy with someone else. I am sorry for everything. I am not sorry that I am the mother of our wonderful daughter. I am sorry that i couldnt make u happy and what ever else. I am sorry that I sorry that I still love you.
Ashley: honestly I dont know what to say to you at this point. we do need to talk but I dont think I am ready to talk to you right now about the convosation we had on the computer today. when I am ready I will let you know. There is alot that I cant say to you right now but when I am able to tell you, I will. I am sorry for all the things I have said to you these past couple of days. I am sorry for everything. I will ttyl.
Michele: I am sorry for all the pain that I have caused you. I am sorry that I did what I did to you. I am sorry for everything. I am sorry that I fell in love with the person that made you happy, that person is the same person that made me happy. I am sorry for everything.
Jesse: I am sorry for all the pain I have caused you. I am sorry for eveeything. I am sorry for letting things go bad with us. I have one thing left from our relationahip and that is our wonderful daughter.
To everyone else: I am sorry for all the pain I have caused anyone. I am sorry that you ever met me.
Off to another subject, I am not going to be on till after sept 6 because my mom is on vaction and I am going to be starting school. I am also going to be putting nikki in daycare. I got accepted to st andres. I am waiting on my placement there. I have court monday with Ian. I am going to to end this now. feel free to comment. please not hate. I am sorry that I had to write this but everyone wanted to know what was bothering me....
Ian: I am sorry for all the pain I have caused you in the past. I am greatful that we have a wonderful daughter together. I am sorry that I fucked up our relationship. I am sorry we ever met. I am sorry that I fell in love with you. I am sorry that you are the only one that is able to make me happy and will treat me with respect. I am sorry that I cant deal with the fact that you are happy with someone else. I am sorry for everything. I am not sorry that I am the mother of our wonderful daughter. I am sorry that i couldnt make u happy and what ever else. I am sorry that I sorry that I still love you.
Ashley: honestly I dont know what to say to you at this point. we do need to talk but I dont think I am ready to talk to you right now about the convosation we had on the computer today. when I am ready I will let you know. There is alot that I cant say to you right now but when I am able to tell you, I will. I am sorry for all the things I have said to you these past couple of days. I am sorry for everything. I will ttyl.
Michele: I am sorry for all the pain that I have caused you. I am sorry that I did what I did to you. I am sorry for everything. I am sorry that I fell in love with the person that made you happy, that person is the same person that made me happy. I am sorry for everything.
Jesse: I am sorry for all the pain I have caused you. I am sorry for eveeything. I am sorry for letting things go bad with us. I have one thing left from our relationahip and that is our wonderful daughter.
To everyone else: I am sorry for all the pain I have caused anyone. I am sorry that you ever met me.
Off to another subject, I am not going to be on till after sept 6 because my mom is on vaction and I am going to be starting school. I am also going to be putting nikki in daycare. I got accepted to st andres. I am waiting on my placement there. I have court monday with Ian. I am going to to end this now. feel free to comment. please not hate. I am sorry that I had to write this but everyone wanted to know what was bothering me....