Dear Jon:
It's hard when the one you live for has found its easier to live without you.
Maybe its best that the summer is coming because I'm not sure how well I'll do without you here. You've put a smile in the corner of my eyes and waking up in your arms has been a honor I know I don't deserve.
So here's to every awkward morning-after goodbye, to every phone call left unanswered, to every comment belittled and date deferred. Here's to all the signs I should have seen but was too blissful to ever really comprehend.
I've got a week left in this godforsaken city and it could not pass by quickly enough - I stayed these long, long days for you but now its merely time to fill with memories of predawn kisses and the all-night workloads.
Thank you. Thank you for the best year of my life. Thank you for the nightmares and the tantrums, the headaches and the tears. You confused me, frustrated me and left me shaking like a junkie more nights then I can remember, but I wouldn't trade them for the emptiness that surrounds me now.
I love you, ok? I know its stupid, and I know you don't care. It's too little, too late and I've got four months to remember how to be okay alone with myself again. Four months of a half-full bed and wondering if you'll still be here in the fall.
The clock has run out on this sound and fury and maybe you were right - maybe there's not depth behind the jokes and taunts - but I will treasure every moment and wish you nothing but the best, wherever you go and whatever you do.
I guess this is what goodbye feels like. I guess I had forgotten.
Maybe its best that the summer is coming because I'm not sure how well I'll do without you here. You've put a smile in the corner of my eyes and waking up in your arms has been a honor I know I don't deserve.
So here's to every awkward morning-after goodbye, to every phone call left unanswered, to every comment belittled and date deferred. Here's to all the signs I should have seen but was too blissful to ever really comprehend.
I've got a week left in this godforsaken city and it could not pass by quickly enough - I stayed these long, long days for you but now its merely time to fill with memories of predawn kisses and the all-night workloads.
Thank you. Thank you for the best year of my life. Thank you for the nightmares and the tantrums, the headaches and the tears. You confused me, frustrated me and left me shaking like a junkie more nights then I can remember, but I wouldn't trade them for the emptiness that surrounds me now.
I love you, ok? I know its stupid, and I know you don't care. It's too little, too late and I've got four months to remember how to be okay alone with myself again. Four months of a half-full bed and wondering if you'll still be here in the fall.
The clock has run out on this sound and fury and maybe you were right - maybe there's not depth behind the jokes and taunts - but I will treasure every moment and wish you nothing but the best, wherever you go and whatever you do.
I guess this is what goodbye feels like. I guess I had forgotten.