(no subject)
My smiling inspiration is still missing from my life. Its getting harder to go day to day without having a sad sigh leave me. But, as hard as it is, it almost seems to be getting easier.
I don't like the idea that I'm getting used to this situation, but I guess that means that life is moving on and I can live. I'm still sad that despite all the good things in life recently, there is still only me to rejoyce in them.
What good things? I still have my job. My strained muscle is healing slowly but surely. My muse has her mind back on art again. I'm exploring more medias with art and I'm having fun with it. My confidence in myself is slowly growing more bit by bit. I'm learning to tell myself that I am loved by many people, not by the ones who walk away. My heart is mending itself piece by piece as the days go by. I have also managed to pull an A in all my classes for Spring semester.
What makes me smile now-a-days? I have a rose garden. Yes, an actual rose garden.. and everyday I see one of those roses bloom, I smile and think about all that God has given me. I can stare at the sky and not be mad at Him, but be happy in all the majesty of His creations and what He has put in my life. My beautiful darling furry daughters make me laugh and smile everyday, from dawn till dawn. My mother is a big thing that makes me smile, without her I would have vanished. My friends that have stood by me and let me heal at my pace. Thank you.
I still wish, I still dream, but I can't let those things hold me in the past. I know that the past is gone for that one... at least, thats what it seems like sometimes. I have to move with time, and not be stuck in a time capsule. I now try to look forward to what the future holds. What is it that the Fates have for me? What will the Graces put before me? What new outlook with the Muses put in me?
I don't know... I'll just have to find out with each passing second of the clock and trust that a new door will open.
I don't like the idea that I'm getting used to this situation, but I guess that means that life is moving on and I can live. I'm still sad that despite all the good things in life recently, there is still only me to rejoyce in them.
What good things? I still have my job. My strained muscle is healing slowly but surely. My muse has her mind back on art again. I'm exploring more medias with art and I'm having fun with it. My confidence in myself is slowly growing more bit by bit. I'm learning to tell myself that I am loved by many people, not by the ones who walk away. My heart is mending itself piece by piece as the days go by. I have also managed to pull an A in all my classes for Spring semester.
What makes me smile now-a-days? I have a rose garden. Yes, an actual rose garden.. and everyday I see one of those roses bloom, I smile and think about all that God has given me. I can stare at the sky and not be mad at Him, but be happy in all the majesty of His creations and what He has put in my life. My beautiful darling furry daughters make me laugh and smile everyday, from dawn till dawn. My mother is a big thing that makes me smile, without her I would have vanished. My friends that have stood by me and let me heal at my pace. Thank you.
I still wish, I still dream, but I can't let those things hold me in the past. I know that the past is gone for that one... at least, thats what it seems like sometimes. I have to move with time, and not be stuck in a time capsule. I now try to look forward to what the future holds. What is it that the Fates have for me? What will the Graces put before me? What new outlook with the Muses put in me?
I don't know... I'll just have to find out with each passing second of the clock and trust that a new door will open.