It's F*ing Monday

[angel_in_rust]

So for those of you who haven't read Zack's lj or don't know him, damn near our whole domain has bitched and ragged on him behind our backs rather than dealing with their problems with him directly and honestly and we got to find all this out Saturday from our lovely, honest, and blunt DC.  I spent one of the ONLY days I haven't enjoyed at my new job feeling awkward and unhappy because I had to avoid a friend of mine because I didn't want to hear her side and risk trying to defend her to Zack as I'm well and firmly on his side and feel equally betrayed by a number of who I thought were honest straightforward people.  Rather than speaking with her directly, because I didn't want to end up fighting with her in defense of my fiance (especially not at work) or getting her side of the story and then feeling the need to defend her to Zack, I wrote her a letter.  I tried to give her some insight into his side of things to help her sort things out with him.  I tried to make it clear that I was trying to avoid conflict by not talking to her till she'd talked to him.  Well, failure.  Instead of helping, I got a defensive return letter telling me a was an awful friend for not talking to her and defending her side.  That's why I didn't talk to you doll.  I didn't want to hear your side, I wanted to help you give it to Zack in a way that would give you a chance to patch things.

Now I've finally gotten home after a day of feeling like or surrounded by shit and end up fighting with Zack because we're both strained, unhappy, and testy due to the whole f*ed up situation and are both so sensitive to tone right now we can't tell terse from tired or harping from helping.  I'm so tired and still so hurt and I can't hardly help Zack feel better which makes it all worse.  If only Phoenix weren't so far and expensive.  If only our jobs weren't turning towards being so promising.  If only people were more honest in the first place.