Daily Grind & Friends Too Far
So all I've really done lately is go to work, try to find time to spend with Zack in between our completely different work schedules, and buy some stuff online for the new apartment. All of that's gone pretty good (great in the case of Zack even if the schedules suck). Yet despite life generally being pretty decent I've realized how completely out of touch I've let myself get with my friends and it bothers me.
I watch Zack get on the computer all the time talking to friends continually and I read my friend's ljs and their adventures with friends and what not and I'm jealous. And it's completely stupid. I know I can do better to stay in touch with my friends and I should, but my problem lately is I don't want to just stay in touch. I don't want to sit in front of my computer every night like I used to in college or kill my battery on my cell phone talking all the time. I want to hang out with my friends like I used to...and then I realize that I used to cause I used to have friends that lived nearby. Now I've graduated and moved away from my friends in Chicago and made friends in a bunch of different places through the cam...but here in Kansas City...I've got Zack and Dani (and let me take this moment to say they're great and I love them both dearly and without them this would be so much worse and I know I would not be as happy by far!) and some others that I mainly only see at game. There's the occasional movie trip with D and Jazz but that's not even regular.
I'm really hoping this changes once we have our own place and I can actually invite people over to our apartment instead of my mom's house. I'm also hoping I get better about calling my friends who are far away once I have space of my own. I know that sounds ridiculous, ("What you can't pick up your phone cause you're crammed into your mom's house?") but I think it's part of it. I need to call people more often. I have no idea how Carrisa is, or Teslen, or Chris, or Howie, or Laura, or Tim, or Vic, or Jim, Pants, Suzanne, Crystal, Laura H, Lisa F, and the list goes on. I can't believe that when my mom asked the other day how Mouse is (my best friend in the world) I had to say I had no idea. I'd have to say the same about any of my friends right now. Hell I found out Krista's shipping down to the border from Zack and she's supposed to be one of my second best friends in the world! It's unacceptable and I can't believe I've let it happen.
The part that worries me is I'm not sure I'll keep it up. I'm sure this swell of desire to get back in touch with my friends will keep me calling them for about two weeks, everyone at least once...but I know myself....I'm bad about this kind of thing...and the worst part is that all I can do is call or get online. If I want to see most of my friends I have to plan it in advance by at least a month. You'd think the solution would be to move closer to the most of them...but that's not even the answer cause they're scattered all over.
::sighs:: But there's really nothing I can do about it aside from try to call or get online more often and maybe dare to hope to import some of them to KC, permanently or just for a visit, and look forward to the cons of the year. Just know those of you who should know who they are: I do miss you and I do still consider you friends. I'm sorry I've not been better with keeping in touch. I hope all is well with you and I'll try to call you soon.
Luvs,
V