1st Letter
I’ve deleted my facebook and twitter account. In the moment, I am thinking about deleting my live journal. Well, I am really having a hard time to decide if I’ll delete my account or not. Aside from the reason I want to take control of my accounts again, I was thinking, that I’ll open an account with the new me… better me…
I don’t know why, but lately, I am starting to believe that my dreams were about to come true. Lately, I am thinking that some events that happening around me is pushing me towards my dream. It might sound crazy, (I might be) but then, I thought, maybe I am thinking out loud about my true heart’s desire.
Looking back at my past entries, I thought, “Why do I feel so hopeless and very pessimist at that time? What just happen back there? Did I just lose my faith back there?” Because funny thing is, I feel so optimist at the moment. It is true that I can’t do anything with my past, but I feel glad in the thought of I can still do something towards my future. I am telling myself that not because I was lost in the path that I wanted, doesn’t mean I can’t find that path anymore. That path will be and will always be there, all I have to do is to keep on walking until I reach it. ~
(This will sound weird and crazy) These past few days, I feel so excited. Why? Because, I believe that my imaginations will finally come to life and the greatest news in there - to me. What do I mean by that? Well, coincidentally, almost all my imagination was happening to other people! Though, it is amazing, I always feel hurt every time this happens, because it was supposedly to happen in me and not to other people. (I really feel cheated. Hahaha~) But anyway, like what I am saying earlier, I have a high hopes now towards tomorrow. I even act according to my imagination, but there is creepier than that. Everything seems happening according to what I imagined, well, not exactly what I imagined, but the theme/ principle (I don’t know what to call) is just the same. It did give me goose bumps.
Yeah~ I guess God is finally giving it to me after the long wait. Now, it’s all up to me to make my part.
I know I am asking much, but God, please, help me still…
Till next time~