loo loo loo I've got sum apples
Yeah.....spring break I was fine..I felt like I gained confidence-I felt better-and new--smarter-but I went back to school and felt the exact opposite. From the moment I get there til the moment I leave-all I want to do is go home and sleep. I feel that I don't matter and I am wasting my time on whatever I do. Like James for example. I went back and forth a few times on whether to try for him. I am going to. I made a list of goals. They are written now-so I think they will be easier to follow. I will force myself to get good grades, exercise they way I want, and to talk to James. I need to be positive, and not think I have a sucky life-or else I will become that negative person who does nothing and gets nothing. I didn't eat lunch yesterday because I had no money. I didn't eat today because I didn't feel like it really I guess. Then I thought ....so this is how easy it is not to eat....how easy it is to become anorexic...they do it becuz it looks so easy but that isn't and answer to how do I lose the little fat that I want to lose. It's just toning. If i don't eat, eat ,eat I will get rid of it. I know what to do-and I'm gonna do it all-everything I want I will get. I can't sit and wait for it to fall into my lap. No more. I won't think things like I have. I know my life doesn't suck and have said that I have it pretty easy with no major problems...I almost convinced myself that I don't have it easy-but I do. But I promise I won't take things for granted and I will always consider the following. Always, always.