impossible.
Fuck this war and fuck georde bush and fuck al qaeda and fuck osama and fuck tom for joining the fucking army. fuck this.
this week was horrible. every morning sucked exponentially until the next. and even though the nights seemed to get better, the morning always came. and for some reason, they've been absolutely horrible for all different reasons. one day on my way to school i fell in a huge thing of mud- completely covered in fucking mud. the other day, at work, while the corporate manager was right there i knocked over the capp machine onto the grill, spilled 2 pots of coffee, messed up several orders, etc etc. the other day i had a big sociology thing due which required use of the internet, so my internet doesn't work at all. everything that could have gone wrong absolutely did.
and tom came home this weekend. last time before he's shipped out. for a year. a fucking year. he... road side bombs. military insurgents. a dead soldier on the 5:00 news every single night. why? for what? he said to me "you're a senior?! am i that old? i can't believe you're going to be 18." before i left he told me to have fun at my graduation and that he was sorry that he was going to miss it. " even though i don't know how you're going to enjoy it if i'm not there for some graduation sex." he said. first off- graduation scares me. as much as i look forward to it, i'm starting to realize how big this really is, how this is going to change everything, and how i'm going to have to work 3 jobs to afford everything. and then, to think that he'll be in iraq... scares the shit out of me. yes, he can take care of himself. yes, hes a fighter, he'll give it his all. but this is for real now, i know i've said before that it was going to be the last time i was gonna see him for however long... but no, this is seriously the last time. he's leaving as soon as next month. bush said that there was going to be 25000 more troops heading over, and many more deaths... i just hope and pray that the next time i see him is on the news or at his fun..... i dont even wanna say it.
I'm overwhelmed. I've got that on my plate.... plus I'm getting a second job maybe a third, plus school, plus final exams coming up in a week, plus mcdonals shit, plus everything else.
$5000 for school.
$6000 for a car. plus whatever the cost of insurance is.
$5000 for an apartment. more if i dorm.
-----------------------------------------------------
$16,000. i have to come up with $16,000 by this summer.
-$700 that i have saved
- $?? scholarships
...thats it. other than that... i need 143297514395714395 jobs and enough time to do it.
i have no idea how on earth i am going to pull off the next few weeks. and months. and whatever.
this week was horrible. every morning sucked exponentially until the next. and even though the nights seemed to get better, the morning always came. and for some reason, they've been absolutely horrible for all different reasons. one day on my way to school i fell in a huge thing of mud- completely covered in fucking mud. the other day, at work, while the corporate manager was right there i knocked over the capp machine onto the grill, spilled 2 pots of coffee, messed up several orders, etc etc. the other day i had a big sociology thing due which required use of the internet, so my internet doesn't work at all. everything that could have gone wrong absolutely did.
and tom came home this weekend. last time before he's shipped out. for a year. a fucking year. he... road side bombs. military insurgents. a dead soldier on the 5:00 news every single night. why? for what? he said to me "you're a senior?! am i that old? i can't believe you're going to be 18." before i left he told me to have fun at my graduation and that he was sorry that he was going to miss it. " even though i don't know how you're going to enjoy it if i'm not there for some graduation sex." he said. first off- graduation scares me. as much as i look forward to it, i'm starting to realize how big this really is, how this is going to change everything, and how i'm going to have to work 3 jobs to afford everything. and then, to think that he'll be in iraq... scares the shit out of me. yes, he can take care of himself. yes, hes a fighter, he'll give it his all. but this is for real now, i know i've said before that it was going to be the last time i was gonna see him for however long... but no, this is seriously the last time. he's leaving as soon as next month. bush said that there was going to be 25000 more troops heading over, and many more deaths... i just hope and pray that the next time i see him is on the news or at his fun..... i dont even wanna say it.
I'm overwhelmed. I've got that on my plate.... plus I'm getting a second job maybe a third, plus school, plus final exams coming up in a week, plus mcdonals shit, plus everything else.
$5000 for school.
$6000 for a car. plus whatever the cost of insurance is.
$5000 for an apartment. more if i dorm.
-----------------------------------------------------
$16,000. i have to come up with $16,000 by this summer.
-$700 that i have saved
- $?? scholarships
...thats it. other than that... i need 143297514395714395 jobs and enough time to do it.
i have no idea how on earth i am going to pull off the next few weeks. and months. and whatever.