(Untitled)

[aneasywayout]

Title: Absolution
Fandom: Super Junior
Pairing: Donghae/Eeteuk
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: 2707
Summary: He felt dirty and sick as the sweat beaded and rolled down his body but that's what he felt of himself anyway.
Disclaimer: Here if it's really needed.
Notes: Contains slightly religious themes don't read if this kind of thing offends you easily.

Comments

[dreamrainydays]

I really liked this. Especially this line:

'If sin had a taste he was willing to bet it was salty'

You managed to invoke so many emotions - one being anger at Donghae's AU!parents. I'm guessing that they were strictly Christian and rather old-fashioned in their view of homosexuality, telling him it was a sin and he was an abomination? I really, really hate that. I've a friend who's gay and who is in a Christian family, and although his mother is the kind to love him anyway, his father's not so much. And he had a lot of problems reconciling his religion with his sexuality (and has now decided he's atheist, because he was unable to). So, yes. I loved how you handled that. And if it wasn't meant to have a religious overtone, I probably just read too much into the wording at times.

'But he could see the bead of sweat start to roll down the side of the older boy's face and he fell back against the bed in defeat. A stain marring Eeteuk's white canvas, he'd tainted the perfect aura that surrounded the boy somehow by letting him be here and in this and he couldn't fix that.'

You handled the guilt and self-loathing really well, didn't drown it with over-dramatic wording and phrases, didn't make it into something unrealistic and plastic. And it seems fitting (if the religious thing I pointed out earlier) that the 'angel' would be the one to save him from himself.

And I'm glad that you didn't make it seem like everything was okay again at the end. Because obviously it would take more than that to make the 'voices' (heartbreaking, they were) go away. But I liked how you said that when Eetuek was near, they went away, meaning the physical presence of Eetuek helped, but there was still work to be done for when he wasn't. You made it seem like a snapshot into someone's life, a moment that you snatched and will replace as soon as you've written it down.

I really like it.

And to talk about the almost-smut (well, it was too beautiful to be smut, so...). I liked the contrast between the beginning and the actual sex. The tentative touches, the reassurance, the healing of Donghae, the 'is this okay?' feeling you got from him and the gentle, firm, unyielding presence of Eetuek. And the desperation, the clutching hold of what they could, the...it almost felt like they were signing a deal. *nods*

It's good ^_~

[aneasywayout]

Wow I'm not even worthy of the comments I've been getting on this story. Thank you so much this review was amazing. I didn't set out for it to hav e the religious undertones they kind of developed on their own but I know too many overly zealous religious people and it's really a shame.

If there's anything I hate it's a powerful story that people completely ruin at the very end with magical solutions that wouldn't happen in real life. If you write about real situations they should have real reactions to the problems that face them. I hope I at least gave some glimmer of hope to poor Donghae's life though I do love to torture the ones I love most :[

Thank you soooo much for reviewing it means a lot. ^_^