loose cannons
I tell you what. I KNOW that you're not interested in what happens in my life. I know. So I suggest an easier way of trawling through this alphabet post. The low-fat alternative to reading the whole thing - just read the letters that you have in your name. This means that folks like Jai, Aisy, Lou and Emma have a virtually painless soujourn through the otherwise daunting labyrinth that is my LiveJournal. i mean, RJ hardly even has to try. In fact, Christ, do any of you have names with more than six letters?
heh. anyway, on with the show.
a) oh my GOD Amazon DVD rental is the most delicious idea ever. I mean, seriously, we all know how crap Blockbusters is - overpriced films, underpaid staff, and they never have anything in. But this is great, this thing. I've created like a wishlist of 30 films (on Dad's account, which is another pluspoint) which you'd never catch in Blockbusters or what have you. To be honest, I miss the days when there was a Video Action next to the chippy (they turned it into two estate agents. it's so silly. the order of buildings, from the end, goes Estate Agent, Estate Agent, Chippy, Estate Agent. houses must be cheap), because they had a decent range of films and it was closer. Nowadays, I end up going down there, getting three films for a fiver for the week, and only watching one of them. I feel something of a revolution coming on. So far as my rented film-watching habits go, anyway.
b) because happiness isn't happiness with a violin-playing goat. YES, no points for recognising that line from the marvellous Notting Hill. I was watching it yesterday over at Emma's. She rang me up the other day, you see, and said -andy, you really ought to come over to my house and let me lose to you at table tennis- (because that is basically what happened. seven or eight times). Emma's great, though. We had a good day, didn't we? And at least, unlike some, she doesn't STILL claim to be better at a sport after losing 6-0 *grin*. Ah, sour grapes. Yes. Sunday was really nice
c) One of the nicest parts of it, in the pre-Emma hours, was the chicken sandwich that I had some time after three o' clock. That was a damn fine sandwich.
d) On Friday night, Andy and I trundled over to the NEC (read: blackmailed Phil into giving us a lift. I knew there was more to that mysterious last-minute trip to Amsterdam than he was letting on. he didn't even take a briefcase.) to see Queen play live in concert. Well, only half of them - Freddie Mercury is kind of dead and John Deacon - we're not sure, actually. I think he may have retired from being a musician, sort of like how George Michael has. It was still a great show, though, I really loved it. Obviously it wasn't the same without Freddie, but they (Brian May and Roger Taylor) were more aware of that than we were. They had the lead singer of Free, Paul Rodgers, doing the vocals. It all worked so well - they started with a few classics (I was hooked from "Fat Bottomed Girls" onwards), then after about the first forty-five minutes/hour, Paul Rodgers went offstage for a while, and they focused more closely on the two remaining members. Brian May did some beautiful acoustic solo stuff, before Roger Taylor did an inbelievable - yes, INBELIEVABLE - drum solo - before Brian May whipped his electric out, so to speak, and did some fantastic solo guitaring. You have a tendency to forgot, with Freddie Mercury being such a genius and all, how much talent these other guys have - not to mention all having terrific voices.
And line break, because Adam's eyes are getting tired. If he's even made it this far. Aisy got halfway through b), thought disgustedly to herself "damn, he still hasn't changed his ways", and dropped straight to the bottom to tell me my posts are too fucking long. ahehe. At least she comments <3
In the third part of the night, if you will, Paul Rodgers came back out and they went for some of the all-time classics - "Under Pressure", "Radio Ga Ga", a terrific cover of Free's "All Right Now", "I Want It All", "We Will Rock You", "Hammer to Fall", or whatever that one's called. Bohemian Rhapsody was beautifully put together. Instead of actually performing it, they dimmed the stage and put the big screen up, showing Freddie Mercury performing it back during LiveAid, or whenever it was. They had that on for the first section, then during the "easy come easy go" bit, they started playing their instruments over the top, with a montage of Freddie clips, and bits of the video. The screen was off during the guitar solo, at which point Brian May just kicked ass, and Paul Rodgers came on to do the "spit in my eye" lines. Then, over the last bit (can you tell I was sort of paying slightly RAPT attention during this bit? I mean, okay, forgive me, but this is my favourite ever song), they did it all quietly, with another montage of Freddie clips, and just wound it down beautifully, pausing before the final keyboard solo and MAN okay, I know that this is a touch obsessive but it was done so perfectly. <3
They finished with "We Are the Champions", of course. It was so great. A few people from LION were there, as well as Andy, and we all agreed that it was a killer concert. I think I should go to more concerts.
e) I just ordered the OC Season One DVD boxset from play.com. This should really tell you everything you need to know about me.
f) Last Thursday was a funny night. I went for a game of squash after work (and actually won, this time). Went for a celebratory pint in the Jockey at about 7, and that was fine. Then at about half past Faye joined me in there, and we had a few drinks. And then her brother arrived, and then later my sister and Dave D arrived, and basically, I had far too much to drink - especially for a worknight, ouch. Ended up waking up on Friday morning too drunk to drive to work. My original plan to sober up and go in at about 11 failed around the time I fell asleep and didn't get up 'til half three. Probably for the best, though. Curiously, I ended up with a blank memory that night - I remember being in the pub, and being at home afterwards and discussing the election - but I don't remember actually getting BETWEEN the two. Faye swears I was carrying her at one point. WELL I DON'T KNOW. Probably true. Either way, it was a cracking night. I love Faye.
g) Speaking of the election, how funny is it that by way of congratulation on winning an unprecedented third term, most of Tony Blair's party are telling him to resign? Poor sod. Mind you, I didn't vote for him, so I suppose I can't feel too sympathetic. I voted, as you all may have guessed, conservative. It is the one true path.
h) On May 22, a Sunday in the not too distant future, I and my chippy buddies are going for a meal at Pizza Express. It's quite cool, really - there's quite a bunch of us young uns, now - scarily, I'm the oldest. There's me, Faye, Jess, Lizzy, Joe, Grace - and Maria, who is like the honorary young person. They're all great, though. HAd a chance to work with Joe this Saturday which was grand, as I don't see him much. In fact - CREEPILY (creppily, as I originally typed), in my last three shifts I've worked with 1) Lizzy and Maria, 2) Grace and Jess, 3) Faye and Joe. how UNLIKELY but cool.
i) am a spendthriftly spendthrifter. you know my brother owes me £2000? I know, it's like we've been playing real life Monopoly, or something. what was nice about working on Saturday was that I'd also worked bank holiday money, so I had an INFLATED pay packet. How exciting! Even if I did have to give lots of it to Rich for all the framing he's been doing for me. He did a cracking job on a picture I have from my school prom, of all of us looking faintly ridiculous in smart clothing (except me. I just look smarmy).
j) I did manage to get some dollars changed on Saturday, which is good - and also sort out Maria's present, which is sure to be a fantastic surprise (that is, she specified what she wanted, in what size and colour, and from where :p). I'm getting very excited about it - only two weeks on Thursday until I jet off. We're sure to have a cracking time.
k) Tuesday tomorrow. I sort of like Tuesday. It's my busiest day of the week, I suppose - considering it used to be a case of double free, double free, French, double free when I was at school, it's turned around a little bit, and become the new Thursday (damn I used to hate Thursdays. Now they're great). There's work, obviously, then football straight after that. Then I get home at about 7.30pm, have some food or what have you, and have a piano lesson from about 8.45-9.45. Which is usually good fun. After that I watch the OC. Because, you know. The OC! See e)
l) Today at work was quite funny. I spent most of the day in Goods In - thus the checklist ticking and label peeling schools of thought come into play pretty heavily. It was a nice enough day, though. Went straight from work to get a haircut after battling through heavy traffic. My hair looks, well, to say the least- no, wait, scrap that. I'll get my sister to describe it to you instead. That way, you know you're getting an unbiased opinion (ha). AHAHAH. Firstly, this little interchange:
Her: Oh, so what do you want my opinion on?
Me: My hair.
Her: *evil cackle* Oh. You sure?
She's pretty much been cackling the entire time I've been writing all that, too. Apparently, it's kind of on the pooey side. Oy vey
"what's that in the- what's all that gooey stuff? either you've not been washing it or you've been putting crap in it or I don't want to know, frankly - seriously, my hands are sticky!"
my sister, everyone
m) To All The Women Out There - PAY ATTENTION, my name is Helen and I'm using lots of Capital Letters - well, all two of you - Andy smells, and if you ever consider being his lovah, look at his room. That'll put you off for life. Considering you'll DIE from the SMELL and BAD DECOR. P.S. if you have a spare drumkit, I'll have it.
*pause*
I'm so hilarious.
n) i keep having really messed up dreams. I can't actually tell you what they're about, they're just that messed up, but I'd like - well there was this one with a girl who was dying - but no, not a path we should go down, really. I just feel that - well, put it this way. Maybe if you tell me one of your weird dreams, I'll tell you one of mine. But it has to be 19/23 on my weirdness scale, otherwise no dice. DO WE HAVE A DEAL?
o) Oh hell. Z looks so far from here.
p) I know this is going to come as a shock, of sorts, but I've actually run out of things to say. Before the 4000 word mark, as well! But yes, I'm tapped out. I blame running off to watch West Wing at around the l) mark, when I was in full swing and everything was doing magnificently. Sometimes I'm in a wordy mood, you see.
q) Right, Space Cadets, I think we've reached the end of the road here. I'm going to go and watch Daria and then go to bed. Mm, Daria. I might even sneak a Belgian waffle into the equation, I dunno. Anyway. Drat. How lame am I? Only managing to reach q). I feel like a fraud. I'm going to have to start updating with fifty-word posts (how? HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE?)
r) ooh. I started reading a BOOK the other day. I think that's the explanation for my ... well, it would explain a bit, that's for sure - but I haven't read a book for ages and now i'm on my THIRD of this week. Mind you, two of them were Eoin Colfer books, but I've moved onto Richard Dawkins' The Selfish Gene which is interesting, although Dawkins has my tendency to go off at a complete tangent half the time. And, like me, he uses a lot of words I don't really understand, but after that the parallels start to stray a little. It's good so far, though.
s) I went to see Rachel today for the first time in about a month. After sort of fucking her off for another bunch of people that other week, she ignored me for a bit. but we're cool, now - she's had enough alcohol since to have forgotten the entire incident - but I don't think she'll be coming down the pub again any time soon. Which is sad. She's great <3
t) Helen's started counting down letters of the alphabet to z. She doesn't think I can do it. Ha. So little height, so little faith. I think it's because she needs to come online and see if she has any reviews for her Daria fanfic, or what have you.
u) So. Recommend films to me, people, with your review out of 100. Because I need to start rentin'
v) I saw the trailer for Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. I have to admit - hahah, I actually managed to write something where Helen didn't go "come ON you bastard" - it's not bad. I mean, there's not a lot to it, but I don't see that as a necessarily bad thing, from my experience of Harry Potter films. Besides, I guess less is more is definitely going to have to apply to GoF. But, y'know. In spite of complaining more than everyone ever about the HP films, I'm still bound to be first in line to see the new film when it's out. Just like how Revenge of the Sith is likely to be highly crap, but I'm still excited about seeing it. This reminds me of an article i read in the Friday Review about how all our film expectations have been dramatically lowered by all these blockbusters that are just shocking. I think it may have been titled "the phantom menace factor".
w) Well, I figure sign-off is two letters alone, so we're doing good work! What Helen fails to understand is that I'm not struggling on 'til the bitter end for the sake of you lot - god knows you stopped paying any attention ages ago - it's for my personal satisfaction, and slightly to get on her nerves for eating my cake earlier. I said she could have HALF, and she ate like THREE QUARTERS. I mean, she can't even use a knife properly, she's just a walking belly with drumsticks.
x) I have a diseased foot!
y) I've even managed to finish this post the right side of midnight. How awesome. Oh well. Now I'm cool not to post for another week, at least. OH! I can't believe I've got this far without mentioning the football at all. AHahah, Helen practically just committed suicide. Seriously though. I'll stop. Did I ever tell you I played the piano? Let me start from the start. This takes us back to 1992. An interesting year, by all accounts, especially for the Danish. Now, it was about that time that a small prancing man called Fritz AHHHHHH THE DRUMSTICKS. THE DRUMSTICKS. DO I LOOK LIKE A BLEEDING CRASH SYMBOL I'LL CRASH YOU IN A MINUTE.
z) Victory. [the end]
-andy xx
p.s. RIGHT. Time to check for grammar and spelling errors! OW THE POKING MAKE THE POKING STOP
heh. anyway, on with the show.
a) oh my GOD Amazon DVD rental is the most delicious idea ever. I mean, seriously, we all know how crap Blockbusters is - overpriced films, underpaid staff, and they never have anything in. But this is great, this thing. I've created like a wishlist of 30 films (on Dad's account, which is another pluspoint) which you'd never catch in Blockbusters or what have you. To be honest, I miss the days when there was a Video Action next to the chippy (they turned it into two estate agents. it's so silly. the order of buildings, from the end, goes Estate Agent, Estate Agent, Chippy, Estate Agent. houses must be cheap), because they had a decent range of films and it was closer. Nowadays, I end up going down there, getting three films for a fiver for the week, and only watching one of them. I feel something of a revolution coming on. So far as my rented film-watching habits go, anyway.
b) because happiness isn't happiness with a violin-playing goat. YES, no points for recognising that line from the marvellous Notting Hill. I was watching it yesterday over at Emma's. She rang me up the other day, you see, and said -andy, you really ought to come over to my house and let me lose to you at table tennis- (because that is basically what happened. seven or eight times). Emma's great, though. We had a good day, didn't we? And at least, unlike some, she doesn't STILL claim to be better at a sport after losing 6-0 *grin*. Ah, sour grapes. Yes. Sunday was really nice
c) One of the nicest parts of it, in the pre-Emma hours, was the chicken sandwich that I had some time after three o' clock. That was a damn fine sandwich.
d) On Friday night, Andy and I trundled over to the NEC (read: blackmailed Phil into giving us a lift. I knew there was more to that mysterious last-minute trip to Amsterdam than he was letting on. he didn't even take a briefcase.) to see Queen play live in concert. Well, only half of them - Freddie Mercury is kind of dead and John Deacon - we're not sure, actually. I think he may have retired from being a musician, sort of like how George Michael has. It was still a great show, though, I really loved it. Obviously it wasn't the same without Freddie, but they (Brian May and Roger Taylor) were more aware of that than we were. They had the lead singer of Free, Paul Rodgers, doing the vocals. It all worked so well - they started with a few classics (I was hooked from "Fat Bottomed Girls" onwards), then after about the first forty-five minutes/hour, Paul Rodgers went offstage for a while, and they focused more closely on the two remaining members. Brian May did some beautiful acoustic solo stuff, before Roger Taylor did an inbelievable - yes, INBELIEVABLE - drum solo - before Brian May whipped his electric out, so to speak, and did some fantastic solo guitaring. You have a tendency to forgot, with Freddie Mercury being such a genius and all, how much talent these other guys have - not to mention all having terrific voices.
And line break, because Adam's eyes are getting tired. If he's even made it this far. Aisy got halfway through b), thought disgustedly to herself "damn, he still hasn't changed his ways", and dropped straight to the bottom to tell me my posts are too fucking long. ahehe. At least she comments <3
In the third part of the night, if you will, Paul Rodgers came back out and they went for some of the all-time classics - "Under Pressure", "Radio Ga Ga", a terrific cover of Free's "All Right Now", "I Want It All", "We Will Rock You", "Hammer to Fall", or whatever that one's called. Bohemian Rhapsody was beautifully put together. Instead of actually performing it, they dimmed the stage and put the big screen up, showing Freddie Mercury performing it back during LiveAid, or whenever it was. They had that on for the first section, then during the "easy come easy go" bit, they started playing their instruments over the top, with a montage of Freddie clips, and bits of the video. The screen was off during the guitar solo, at which point Brian May just kicked ass, and Paul Rodgers came on to do the "spit in my eye" lines. Then, over the last bit (can you tell I was sort of paying slightly RAPT attention during this bit? I mean, okay, forgive me, but this is my favourite ever song), they did it all quietly, with another montage of Freddie clips, and just wound it down beautifully, pausing before the final keyboard solo and MAN okay, I know that this is a touch obsessive but it was done so perfectly. <3
They finished with "We Are the Champions", of course. It was so great. A few people from LION were there, as well as Andy, and we all agreed that it was a killer concert. I think I should go to more concerts.
e) I just ordered the OC Season One DVD boxset from play.com. This should really tell you everything you need to know about me.
f) Last Thursday was a funny night. I went for a game of squash after work (and actually won, this time). Went for a celebratory pint in the Jockey at about 7, and that was fine. Then at about half past Faye joined me in there, and we had a few drinks. And then her brother arrived, and then later my sister and Dave D arrived, and basically, I had far too much to drink - especially for a worknight, ouch. Ended up waking up on Friday morning too drunk to drive to work. My original plan to sober up and go in at about 11 failed around the time I fell asleep and didn't get up 'til half three. Probably for the best, though. Curiously, I ended up with a blank memory that night - I remember being in the pub, and being at home afterwards and discussing the election - but I don't remember actually getting BETWEEN the two. Faye swears I was carrying her at one point. WELL I DON'T KNOW. Probably true. Either way, it was a cracking night. I love Faye.
g) Speaking of the election, how funny is it that by way of congratulation on winning an unprecedented third term, most of Tony Blair's party are telling him to resign? Poor sod. Mind you, I didn't vote for him, so I suppose I can't feel too sympathetic. I voted, as you all may have guessed, conservative. It is the one true path.
h) On May 22, a Sunday in the not too distant future, I and my chippy buddies are going for a meal at Pizza Express. It's quite cool, really - there's quite a bunch of us young uns, now - scarily, I'm the oldest. There's me, Faye, Jess, Lizzy, Joe, Grace - and Maria, who is like the honorary young person. They're all great, though. HAd a chance to work with Joe this Saturday which was grand, as I don't see him much. In fact - CREEPILY (creppily, as I originally typed), in my last three shifts I've worked with 1) Lizzy and Maria, 2) Grace and Jess, 3) Faye and Joe. how UNLIKELY but cool.
i) am a spendthriftly spendthrifter. you know my brother owes me £2000? I know, it's like we've been playing real life Monopoly, or something. what was nice about working on Saturday was that I'd also worked bank holiday money, so I had an INFLATED pay packet. How exciting! Even if I did have to give lots of it to Rich for all the framing he's been doing for me. He did a cracking job on a picture I have from my school prom, of all of us looking faintly ridiculous in smart clothing (except me. I just look smarmy).
j) I did manage to get some dollars changed on Saturday, which is good - and also sort out Maria's present, which is sure to be a fantastic surprise (that is, she specified what she wanted, in what size and colour, and from where :p). I'm getting very excited about it - only two weeks on Thursday until I jet off. We're sure to have a cracking time.
k) Tuesday tomorrow. I sort of like Tuesday. It's my busiest day of the week, I suppose - considering it used to be a case of double free, double free, French, double free when I was at school, it's turned around a little bit, and become the new Thursday (damn I used to hate Thursdays. Now they're great). There's work, obviously, then football straight after that. Then I get home at about 7.30pm, have some food or what have you, and have a piano lesson from about 8.45-9.45. Which is usually good fun. After that I watch the OC. Because, you know. The OC! See e)
l) Today at work was quite funny. I spent most of the day in Goods In - thus the checklist ticking and label peeling schools of thought come into play pretty heavily. It was a nice enough day, though. Went straight from work to get a haircut after battling through heavy traffic. My hair looks, well, to say the least- no, wait, scrap that. I'll get my sister to describe it to you instead. That way, you know you're getting an unbiased opinion (ha). AHAHAH. Firstly, this little interchange:
Her: Oh, so what do you want my opinion on?
Me: My hair.
Her: *evil cackle* Oh. You sure?
She's pretty much been cackling the entire time I've been writing all that, too. Apparently, it's kind of on the pooey side. Oy vey
"what's that in the- what's all that gooey stuff? either you've not been washing it or you've been putting crap in it or I don't want to know, frankly - seriously, my hands are sticky!"
my sister, everyone
m) To All The Women Out There - PAY ATTENTION, my name is Helen and I'm using lots of Capital Letters - well, all two of you - Andy smells, and if you ever consider being his lovah, look at his room. That'll put you off for life. Considering you'll DIE from the SMELL and BAD DECOR. P.S. if you have a spare drumkit, I'll have it.
*pause*
I'm so hilarious.
n) i keep having really messed up dreams. I can't actually tell you what they're about, they're just that messed up, but I'd like - well there was this one with a girl who was dying - but no, not a path we should go down, really. I just feel that - well, put it this way. Maybe if you tell me one of your weird dreams, I'll tell you one of mine. But it has to be 19/23 on my weirdness scale, otherwise no dice. DO WE HAVE A DEAL?
o) Oh hell. Z looks so far from here.
p) I know this is going to come as a shock, of sorts, but I've actually run out of things to say. Before the 4000 word mark, as well! But yes, I'm tapped out. I blame running off to watch West Wing at around the l) mark, when I was in full swing and everything was doing magnificently. Sometimes I'm in a wordy mood, you see.
q) Right, Space Cadets, I think we've reached the end of the road here. I'm going to go and watch Daria and then go to bed. Mm, Daria. I might even sneak a Belgian waffle into the equation, I dunno. Anyway. Drat. How lame am I? Only managing to reach q). I feel like a fraud. I'm going to have to start updating with fifty-word posts (how? HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE?)
r) ooh. I started reading a BOOK the other day. I think that's the explanation for my ... well, it would explain a bit, that's for sure - but I haven't read a book for ages and now i'm on my THIRD of this week. Mind you, two of them were Eoin Colfer books, but I've moved onto Richard Dawkins' The Selfish Gene which is interesting, although Dawkins has my tendency to go off at a complete tangent half the time. And, like me, he uses a lot of words I don't really understand, but after that the parallels start to stray a little. It's good so far, though.
s) I went to see Rachel today for the first time in about a month. After sort of fucking her off for another bunch of people that other week, she ignored me for a bit. but we're cool, now - she's had enough alcohol since to have forgotten the entire incident - but I don't think she'll be coming down the pub again any time soon. Which is sad. She's great <3
t) Helen's started counting down letters of the alphabet to z. She doesn't think I can do it. Ha. So little height, so little faith. I think it's because she needs to come online and see if she has any reviews for her Daria fanfic, or what have you.
u) So. Recommend films to me, people, with your review out of 100. Because I need to start rentin'
v) I saw the trailer for Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. I have to admit - hahah, I actually managed to write something where Helen didn't go "come ON you bastard" - it's not bad. I mean, there's not a lot to it, but I don't see that as a necessarily bad thing, from my experience of Harry Potter films. Besides, I guess less is more is definitely going to have to apply to GoF. But, y'know. In spite of complaining more than everyone ever about the HP films, I'm still bound to be first in line to see the new film when it's out. Just like how Revenge of the Sith is likely to be highly crap, but I'm still excited about seeing it. This reminds me of an article i read in the Friday Review about how all our film expectations have been dramatically lowered by all these blockbusters that are just shocking. I think it may have been titled "the phantom menace factor".
w) Well, I figure sign-off is two letters alone, so we're doing good work! What Helen fails to understand is that I'm not struggling on 'til the bitter end for the sake of you lot - god knows you stopped paying any attention ages ago - it's for my personal satisfaction, and slightly to get on her nerves for eating my cake earlier. I said she could have HALF, and she ate like THREE QUARTERS. I mean, she can't even use a knife properly, she's just a walking belly with drumsticks.
x) I have a diseased foot!
y) I've even managed to finish this post the right side of midnight. How awesome. Oh well. Now I'm cool not to post for another week, at least. OH! I can't believe I've got this far without mentioning the football at all. AHahah, Helen practically just committed suicide. Seriously though. I'll stop. Did I ever tell you I played the piano? Let me start from the start. This takes us back to 1992. An interesting year, by all accounts, especially for the Danish. Now, it was about that time that a small prancing man called Fritz AHHHHHH THE DRUMSTICKS. THE DRUMSTICKS. DO I LOOK LIKE A BLEEDING CRASH SYMBOL I'LL CRASH YOU IN A MINUTE.
z) Victory. [the end]
-andy xx
p.s. RIGHT. Time to check for grammar and spelling errors! OW THE POKING MAKE THE POKING STOP