94: Summer Magnolias (revision)
I'm really excited right now; I've been feeling pretty depressed lately (especially yesterday, but that's another post...) and the last few weeks I haven't been writing (or rewriting, I should say) 'cause I figured I was too busy. This is also the same reason I've ceased work on the literary magazine. Today I realized that is bull--those things actually give me more structure and help me get things *done* (which is part of why I was depressed yesterday). So, I've decided to stop moping and get going on those, and it's giving me some direction and drive again. Which is good, 'cause I want to keep my promise to Eve about being more positive...
Which brings us to: Summer Magnolias. I just finished revising it, and I'm really proud of it and excited to show it to *everyone* I possibly can. I was thinking about
szandara's comment about it not really having a clear point, and I thought about what the true purpose and intent of the poem is.
This is actually a poem I first came up with the summer before last, just before I wrote "A Poetry Reading" and took a break from writing to figure out the direction I was going, and when I took quite a bit of notes on ideas for poems in that awesome notebook Katharyn gave me when she graduated. That was also the summer I kinda broke from my parents' religion and started hanging out a lot with
jarreddoand his sister Emily. This poem takes place during that summer, and is based loosely on several things. Actually, the original 'walk' I took wasn't in the parking lot, but I sorta amalgamated it because I liked working in the magnolia trees, and in this draft, eventually worked in what I wanted about Emily chewing a magnolia petal, and the real emotion laying behind my physical descriptions. Hope y'all like it...
***
Summer Magnolias
To Emily and Jarod Whiting
The heavy summer air wraps itself around me like a shroud
As I walk between the rows of trees and parked cars,
The asphalt still burning my feet
So long after the sun has fallen -
And the pain still doesn’t fade
This long after they’ve left.
I step across one of the narrows strips of grass
Clustered around the trees’ cement-bordered roots,
Pricking my feet on the yellowed, brittle blades
And stopping between two parked cars
Where the fallen leaves and petals
Soothe and cling to my feet -
But the pain still doesn’t fade
So long after they’ve left.
I stare into the dusty eyes of these hulking beasts
Slumbering beneath their canopy of branches
Shivering protectively over their metal wards -
But none of these chipped, faded hoods belongs to his car.
And I wrap my arms around myself, leaning my head back
To stare at the magnolias hanging above me:
At the smooth, cream-colored cocoons of their closed blooms,
Each nestled like a star among the thick glossy leaves -
And think of how it alarmed me to see her chewing on a petal,
Because I thought it was a white oleander,
As toxic as this heavy scent enclosing me,
Or this breath-stealing summer air.
***
Written August 2006; revised every month through January 2007.
Which brings us to: Summer Magnolias. I just finished revising it, and I'm really proud of it and excited to show it to *everyone* I possibly can. I was thinking about
szandara's comment about it not really having a clear point, and I thought about what the true purpose and intent of the poem is.
This is actually a poem I first came up with the summer before last, just before I wrote "A Poetry Reading" and took a break from writing to figure out the direction I was going, and when I took quite a bit of notes on ideas for poems in that awesome notebook Katharyn gave me when she graduated. That was also the summer I kinda broke from my parents' religion and started hanging out a lot with
jarreddoand his sister Emily. This poem takes place during that summer, and is based loosely on several things. Actually, the original 'walk' I took wasn't in the parking lot, but I sorta amalgamated it because I liked working in the magnolia trees, and in this draft, eventually worked in what I wanted about Emily chewing a magnolia petal, and the real emotion laying behind my physical descriptions. Hope y'all like it...
***
Summer Magnolias
To Emily and Jarod Whiting
The heavy summer air wraps itself around me like a shroud
As I walk between the rows of trees and parked cars,
The asphalt still burning my feet
So long after the sun has fallen -
And the pain still doesn’t fade
This long after they’ve left.
I step across one of the narrows strips of grass
Clustered around the trees’ cement-bordered roots,
Pricking my feet on the yellowed, brittle blades
And stopping between two parked cars
Where the fallen leaves and petals
Soothe and cling to my feet -
But the pain still doesn’t fade
So long after they’ve left.
I stare into the dusty eyes of these hulking beasts
Slumbering beneath their canopy of branches
Shivering protectively over their metal wards -
But none of these chipped, faded hoods belongs to his car.
And I wrap my arms around myself, leaning my head back
To stare at the magnolias hanging above me:
At the smooth, cream-colored cocoons of their closed blooms,
Each nestled like a star among the thick glossy leaves -
And think of how it alarmed me to see her chewing on a petal,
Because I thought it was a white oleander,
As toxic as this heavy scent enclosing me,
Or this breath-stealing summer air.
***
Written August 2006; revised every month through January 2007.