379:
So, in Philosophy today, almost everything Switzer was summarizing about Kant's moral theory got me thinking about the altercation with Zach on Friday night... I wondered if he was feeling that, or if he does not feel any moral conundrum. In which case, Cat is right, and he *is* a fucktard.
Of particular relevance is what Kant says about the "dignity" of a person, as coming from our "good will", and that in deciding if something is moral, you ask if it is compromising the dignity of another--i.e. their worthiness to be happy.
Why I got so mad about it? I thought I was long past the point where someone could take my dignity from me--but it happens again and again and I'll have to change my approach towards protecting that, or otherwise not showing or letting others see that they *can*. Which is why my reaction was bad; just givin' ammunition.
I mean, it's not like he outright insulted me. Just letting me know that I'm succeeding in my aim: "When people first meet you, they think you're a girl." The part that bothers me is the one that came before: "There's so many ways/things I could make fun of you for." Pardon me? What got me angry was even the thought that this lame-ass motherfucker could *ever* think he was better than me.
Just a random musing. I'm less angry about it now, but I just wanted to look at why I got angry and how I could change my approach to this problem. Because my tone when I lashed back at him was exactly that I've used when flailing against my father. And we all know *that* never worked. So why do I feel so threatened?
Ah. Yes. Teh gay thing. The fact that these third floor punks apparently don't know what to make of me.
Of course, as Cat says, maybe they're just jealous, because I do "manage to hang out with so many girls". *shrug* It's open to interpretation.