My Return
I'm really afraid to go back, I know I have to and I have accepted the fact that I am going to. In 2 hours I'll be going through the motions at the airport preparing for my return. I just hope that my plane doesn't get delayed due to storms in Rhode Island and I don't get stuck longer. But I am armed with a few trusty books, so I should be ok. I hate feeling so abandoned. There have only really been two people who have genuinely tried to talk to me. One prompting me with constant questions knowing I needed to talk and the other sitting back the way he always does just letting me get things out of my system before encouraging me to continue. I understand entirely that no one knows what to say, no one wants to say anything that might bother me and they want to leave me alone to have time with my family, but I need everyone right now. I am headed back to Providence, the place that is entirely unfamiliar with no shoulders to lean against or to cry on. I know that may offend those in Providence, but let's face it we're not that close yet. It takes me a while to be trusting like that. I don't like to pick up the phone, as always I don't want to be a burden, but I desperately need to hear the comforting voices of my friends. To laugh and joke about things. To have people finally know what to say to me and to not avoid me. I understand but they have to understand that it makes it that much harder.
So if you don't know what to say to me, you can cross your fingers for me.
So if you don't know what to say to me, you can cross your fingers for me.