[log] all my maps will only show me how to lose my way

[andspinandspin]

Sunday comes, and with it Gilly's energized anxiety - of course it's ridiculous to worry about what to wear, but that doesn't mean she's not going to. She's throwing a too-big-for-her leather jacket on over the dress she settled on when she finally skitters down the stairs, grabbing her purse off the kitchen table and stopping for a moment like the

Comments

[aterastrum]

It's been a long week, and after eight years, any thrill is gone - though there was little to start with. He does what he does because he's good at it, and he knows that, on some level, he enjoys it. It's difficult - always has been - to take pleasure in anything.

The wards alert him to someone appearing at the front gates and for a moment he's confused, almost startled, before he remembers. He frowns, still unable to fathom what's going on here, really. He has his suspicions, as most people who take interest in him are reporters or conspiracy theorists, but she's American, and not connected to his culture. Severus feels like he'd know if she was acting.

And so he rises from his study and goes to meet her, both resigned and on edge.

[andspinandspin]

In her defence - sort of - Gillian Owens is a lot of things, but 'subtle' isn't really among them. People on Mars would probably know if she was acting, and that's honestly probably got a lot to do with how much she is getting away with here. (After all, she's harmless, isn't she?)

"Hi," she says, warm and sure of herself except for how she leans from foot to foot. "You didn't forget I was coming, did you?" She's only teasing, Severus, chillax.

[aterastrum]

"Ms. Owens," he says, a deferential greeting. It isn't that he's being cold, he simply doesn't have many other modes in which to operate. "Welcome to my home."

He doesn't sound very welcoming as he surveys her, though there isn't anything hostile about his countenance. The grounds are massive, though she'd have pinpointed to the entryway to the actual estate. It's a castle.

[andspinandspin]

"Your home is huge." Yes, he...probably knows that already, but Gilly's not exactly the kind of girl who spends a lot of time in or around anything like this, and she's not hiding the fact it's making an impression. After a beat, she adds, "And lovely! It's...wow, it's really big..."

[aterastrum]

"The history is a bit patchwork," he tells her, voice only barely not flat, and leads her with measured steps through the foyer. "And I admit I cared little, outside to check for curses."

Doors open for them and candles cast more light than they aught to - the entire place is enchanted, like some sort of true gothic fairy tale. Though it's clean and he's obviously well off, there's nothing extravagant or incredibly luxurious about the place. It's livable, and to his taste - which is a lot of black, and books everywhere, basically.

[andspinandspin]

Clearly fascinated as they go, the magnitude of it seems to get more of her attention than what seems like casually thorough enchantment. (She thinks she'd do something like that if she could - clever.)

"You do like your books..." Gilly tucks her hands in the sleeves of her coat, gazing around at their surroundings and following him with what to the untrained eye might look like dutiful obedience.

[aterastrum]

"Reading is the last refuge of a wasted life," he says dryly, not knowing that she has now the information to make that remark even more obviously self-depreciating than it is; however he doesn't appear to have any emotional attachment to the sentiment.

Up a grand, wound-up staircase and into a lounge that overlooks the expansive grounds they go. It's twilight, but still visible, and on the patio beyond the ceiling-to-floor windows there is a fountain.

Despite the size and obvious upkeep of the place, there is no sign of any other living thing, not even an owl.

"Is real estate something that interests you?" Since she's so adamant about the roof, and all.

[andspinandspin]

"Oh, my God..." Gilly requires that they pause by the windows, because the fountain has caught her attention. She's not hard to hurry along if he's of a mind, but she is most certainly deciding what she likes best about the place.

"Oh, um. I don't know, I guess." She clasps her hands together, rocking up onto her feet for a second as she walks. "I'm kind of a wanderer, I love seeing new places."

[aterastrum]

That strikes him as a little odd, and there's a subtle shift in him, a little less open, because he suddenly wonders if she's using him to collect strange experiences. Perhaps it's harsh of him to think, but the thought that she's simply impressed upon him due to being the first person she met in the Nexus doesn't occur to him. People do not, as a rule, wish to spend time with him.

He lets her walk, poke things, whatever, hands folded in front of him. "My home is not very exciting, despite the size."

[andspinandspin]

"I like it," Gilly says, simple and honest - she pauses, turning by a wall with one hand flat against it, like something's suddenly occurred to her. "Speaking of your not very exciting home, though, there's someone I ran into who wants to talk to you...? He did try to get me to tell him where you're living, but I'm not that dumb and he was a little too smooth about it. Remus Lupin. He says hi, he said I should tell you he'll be around a while."

It's kind of a gamble, this, because she wholly anticipates Severus wanting to know why the fuck she was talking about him with anyone, and Remus seemed really nice but she got the feeling there was something going on...

And it'd be a pain in the ass if this meant she doesn't get to see the roof.

"Anyway," she says, tipping her head up to look at the ceiling, "I brought some Kix for Herbert. Does he have a name, by the way? Sally just started calling him Herbert, I think he liked it."

[aterastrum]

He doesn't hear anything she says about owls and cereal. He simply stops - not that he was moving to begin with, but there's a change in him. Not as subtle as before but one that melts as if there was nothing there to proceed it. All at once everything about him is very clear: This man is dangerous. This man was a spy. This man was a murder.

There's a long moment of silence after she finishes speaking in which he simply looks at her. When he speaks, his voice is quiet and deadly and like something wound far too tight on the verge of springing.

"...That's very clever of them, sending someone who looks like you."

[andspinandspin]

...oh. Oh, that's not good. Gilly's reaction is a subdued startle, wide-eyed and staying right where she is against the wall. "Nobody sent me anywhere, Severus," she protests, because she'd been expecting he'd be annoyed, maybe, but - this?

This she didn't predict.

[aterastrum]

He's angry and it's obvious, but it's not an outward, screaming anger. It's the sort that folds inward on himself, smoldering ash that's too hot to burn out but hasn't seen oxygen in decades. There's something wounded, too, under that hate.

"I've not gone home," he says, and something about how quiet his voice is makes it worse than shouting. "I've not spoken to anyone, about anything. Stop. Sending people."

He turns away, facing a window, shoulders hunched with tension.

"I want to be left alone."

[andspinandspin]

"Nobody sent me," Gilly says, a thread of fear underlying the very firm tone of voice she's taking. (She can tell he's angry and she thinks she should go, she should just go, she should just go before he gets mad at her, but she doesn't.) "Nobody sent me anywhere. I found this newspaper article and I didn't know what it meant and I didn't want to upset you and- I'm sorry, I've made you...I'm sorry. Nobody sent me here, it's just me. I promise. I swear, Severus, I don't- understand any of this, but I just wanted to show you-"

She's babbling at this point, tripping over her own words, and she takes a breath to slow down before she screws herself over worse in a panic.

[aterastrum]

At 'newspaper article' his eyes narrow and he immediately murmurs accio article. It slips out of her things and into his hands in an instant and he reads it and her little personal notes on there without even a shadow of apology.

There is a significant pause as realization clicks.

"...You asked the nexus about me."

He does not look up as he says this, still staring at that paper. The name 'Regulus' in particular has fixed his attention.

[andspinandspin]

"I did not!" There's a pause. "...not exactly," she amends, cautiously - when she starts edging it's closer rather than further away, but she's staying against the wall like it's a security blanket. "I asked about the war. Mr Lupin-" who said she can use his given name, but she thinks right now that's not a thrilling idea, "-was the only one who thought I wanted to know about you, but he got it wrong, anyway- the point is I'm not doing anything shady!"