Wonderful tonight.
Never in my life have I learned as much as during the last months here in the States. 10 weeks ago I walked to the campus of COA and wondered behind a Resident Adviser. Then I had no idea what was waiting me in the future. So many small choices I have made in the last weeks have brought me to the extreme of personal development. I walked to the studio of the music teacher and bursted in tears when telling him how much I would like to be able to enjoy music. I have been deprived from the pleasure of music since I was five. No one should be laughed at. That really fucked me up.
When people are five of age and still on life's first page
No one has the right to give them a twisted sight.
I keep wondering whether it is important to have the change to mislearn things in order to be forced to relearn. The feeling of unlearning I have now is the biggest pleasure of my existence. Now I am ready to be different than the others. I wasn't a year ago. This society has no place for freaks and a young person must have a space; must fit in. There are so many fails in the world. I was a part of them still four years ago. What took me away? Was it some thing in my childhood (oh, mom, I wish I could ask you...How did you raise me?)
Or was it the simple fact that I have seen two opposing worlds? The Finland-world and the UWC-bubble-world. And then reflected upon them. I have been forced to.
I have never been less fucked up than now.
When people are five of age and still on life's first page
No one has the right to give them a twisted sight.
I keep wondering whether it is important to have the change to mislearn things in order to be forced to relearn. The feeling of unlearning I have now is the biggest pleasure of my existence. Now I am ready to be different than the others. I wasn't a year ago. This society has no place for freaks and a young person must have a space; must fit in. There are so many fails in the world. I was a part of them still four years ago. What took me away? Was it some thing in my childhood (oh, mom, I wish I could ask you...How did you raise me?)
Or was it the simple fact that I have seen two opposing worlds? The Finland-world and the UWC-bubble-world. And then reflected upon them. I have been forced to.
I have never been less fucked up than now.