reasons to quit posting on makeoutclub.com
1) i originally started posting on there because i had a good time doing it. i'm not having a good time anymore. yes, i've made a lot of friends through said website (the ultimate frustration of having tons of friends but all of them living so far away you rarely/never see them being left aside), but those people will still be my friends if i leave, especially since the lion's share of them don't post anymore. i can write emails and call them on the phone, which i already do anyway.
2) the overwhelming mentality is one of insecurity, which comes out particularly through the constant putdowns and character assassinations people on there direct at other people. regardless of whether or not anyone had any reason to turn the spotlight on me recently (more on that in a minute), it's not something that i enjoy seeing under ANY circumstances. even when it's being directed at people i don't know or hate, my instinct is to sympathize with the underdog. it tends to make me feel sick to even see it, and there's been a lot of it to see lately.
3) if anything, my and other people's attempts at more active moderation have made it worse. the lack of moderation in the past encouraged people who just wanted to be assholes to stick around, while it ran off the ones who didn't enjoy fighting and being attacked all the time. so not only are the kids i like most ending up bailing out (koley's the latest to take off), i don't like the content that's replacing them.
4) all of that just adds up to stuff about why it's not as good as it used to be. but then when i was moderator (for the four days i actually held the position), i deleted stuff that i felt to be inappropriate content, and ended up becoming the center for all of the most vicious mudslinging that's happened since. one of the main people involved in posting the stuff i found inappropriate was a person i've been friends with for years, but as soon as i deleted one of his threads, he totally went after me and basically pitched our friendship to the side in favor of using everything personal he knew about me to blacken my own name. despite it happening six years ago, the fact that i dated [name removed on second thought] when she was 14 and i was 23 got brought BACK up (for probably the third time in the history of my posting on moc), and everyone is currently engaged in the third straight day of bashing me for it. never mind the fact that i regret it now, never mind the fact that i realize what i did was wrong, never mind the fact that i didn't have sex with her... no mitigating factors are considered. instead, i not only WAS but AM STILL a creepy child molestor. some of the kids on there are at least relatively understanding of facts over hype, but it's hard to watch all this shit being posted about myself and not want to try and explain, to sort out what's legitimate, what's hyped up and not true, etc. i can't put myself through this. it's ruined the last three days of my life, and made me really depressed.
5) and today i realized (or rather, remembered): i don't need it. sure, it's something i've been involved for years, sure it used to be fun, but fuck it. i have real friends in real life, all of whom dealt with the [name removed] situation at some point in the past, most of whom had to deal with it when it was happening, and all of whom have made their peace with me, whether they were ok with it at the time or not. i can post on other message boards when i'm bored at work. hell, i can read books instead of posting on message boards. i don't need this ridiculous notion of an internet community. all it does is make me sad. i haven't written in weeks. why let this fuck me up even more?
in conclusion: i'm done. maybe i'll go back in 6 months or a year, and see how it's doing. maybe not. in the end, all that matters is that i do something that will make me feel better. and continuing to post on makeutclub isn't it.
p.s. try to keep the "i'm better than you because you care about a message board" comments to a minimum, kids.
2) the overwhelming mentality is one of insecurity, which comes out particularly through the constant putdowns and character assassinations people on there direct at other people. regardless of whether or not anyone had any reason to turn the spotlight on me recently (more on that in a minute), it's not something that i enjoy seeing under ANY circumstances. even when it's being directed at people i don't know or hate, my instinct is to sympathize with the underdog. it tends to make me feel sick to even see it, and there's been a lot of it to see lately.
3) if anything, my and other people's attempts at more active moderation have made it worse. the lack of moderation in the past encouraged people who just wanted to be assholes to stick around, while it ran off the ones who didn't enjoy fighting and being attacked all the time. so not only are the kids i like most ending up bailing out (koley's the latest to take off), i don't like the content that's replacing them.
4) all of that just adds up to stuff about why it's not as good as it used to be. but then when i was moderator (for the four days i actually held the position), i deleted stuff that i felt to be inappropriate content, and ended up becoming the center for all of the most vicious mudslinging that's happened since. one of the main people involved in posting the stuff i found inappropriate was a person i've been friends with for years, but as soon as i deleted one of his threads, he totally went after me and basically pitched our friendship to the side in favor of using everything personal he knew about me to blacken my own name. despite it happening six years ago, the fact that i dated [name removed on second thought] when she was 14 and i was 23 got brought BACK up (for probably the third time in the history of my posting on moc), and everyone is currently engaged in the third straight day of bashing me for it. never mind the fact that i regret it now, never mind the fact that i realize what i did was wrong, never mind the fact that i didn't have sex with her... no mitigating factors are considered. instead, i not only WAS but AM STILL a creepy child molestor. some of the kids on there are at least relatively understanding of facts over hype, but it's hard to watch all this shit being posted about myself and not want to try and explain, to sort out what's legitimate, what's hyped up and not true, etc. i can't put myself through this. it's ruined the last three days of my life, and made me really depressed.
5) and today i realized (or rather, remembered): i don't need it. sure, it's something i've been involved for years, sure it used to be fun, but fuck it. i have real friends in real life, all of whom dealt with the [name removed] situation at some point in the past, most of whom had to deal with it when it was happening, and all of whom have made their peace with me, whether they were ok with it at the time or not. i can post on other message boards when i'm bored at work. hell, i can read books instead of posting on message boards. i don't need this ridiculous notion of an internet community. all it does is make me sad. i haven't written in weeks. why let this fuck me up even more?
in conclusion: i'm done. maybe i'll go back in 6 months or a year, and see how it's doing. maybe not. in the end, all that matters is that i do something that will make me feel better. and continuing to post on makeutclub isn't it.
p.s. try to keep the "i'm better than you because you care about a message board" comments to a minimum, kids.