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Title: Cunning Devil On My Shoulder.
Rating: R.
Words: around 2.400
Pairings: House/Chase
Warnings: Halloween, silliness, not much plot, sequel to: “I’m Your Faith, You’re My God”, but a very silly one. Suggested sex in the chapel. Some swearing. Lots of costumes.
Summary: Halloween party at PPTH.
Disclaimer: Not mine! And it’s probably better that way! XD
Beta: NONE! (and I’m too tired to care)
A/N (dedication): Written for and dedicated to
natinio !
A/N (explanation): It takes place around two years after “I’m Your Faith, You’re My God” and I suppose you have to be somehow familiar with the previous story. Or at least know that Chase was a priest in this verse and dumped medical career. And then came House and corrupted him. :)
Also, I thought it wouldn’t be right if Chase was one of the Ducklings, since he had much less experience etc, ‘cause he didn’t practice ever. But Foreman and Cameron got already hired here. And since I think three is a magic number I hired also another Duckling, who’s my favorite from the new bunch. :D
A/N (visualization): links to the costumes at the end.
Cunning Devil On My Shoulder.
They definitely needed a bigger closet. Or another small closet. Or at least a maid. Or something else that would make finding something in here somehow easier. House sighed tiredly, but refused to give up on his quest. Chase asked just once, but upon receiving no remark and only seeing his lover’s determined look, he gave up and just went out to do some shopping.
Sometimes it felt weird of how well adjust they’ve become, but it somehow worked out and that was enough for House. Enough to let it go on for another few years. After all if they hadn’t kill each other for the first two they lived together, they probably won’t do it later either. Everything somehow worked out. Robert was working in ICU, getting experience needed to work as a full-time surgeon and House finally managed to complete a team of three doctors, so Cuddy stopped bothering him. Sometimes he hoped he’ll be one day able to work with his Wombat, but for now it was completely out of question.
House shrugged at his thought and went back to searching through the closer, after all there was always a chance that before Chase will get good enough to work with him Foreman will be trained well enough to leave. Or Cameron will give up on her schoolgirl crush and leave. Or 13 will die. There was no need to worry about that now, he could always fire someone.
He smiled happily at the object in his hands, drugged from under his running shoes, some old jackets and Chase’s old backpack. If there was one thing House enjoyed it was when his plans worked as they were supposed to, and a first thing to achieve that was gathering all the necessary equipment.
The sound of the door being opened informed him of Chase’s came back and he quickly tossed things back to the closet, making even bigger mess than there already was. The clothing he found was tossed on the bed, while the doctor shakily got up from the floor, his leg protesting at sitting uncomfortably for that long. One swallowed Vicodin made it shut up and allowed House to limp into the kitchen and confront his Wombat who was now putting the bought stuff away.
“You found what you were looking for?” Asked Robert barely glancing at the other man, too concentrated on the task at hand.
“Yes. And you’re going to love it.”
Chase just looked at his lover doubtfully.
“Well, okay, you’ll probably hate it, but I’d love it and you love making me happy.”
“Yeah… The main purpose of my life.”
“Exactly. And you’ll be able to show it off on the most romantic day of the year.”
“Halloween?”
“Precisely,” answered House, obviously somehow pleased with Chase catching on so quickly.
“Do I dare ask why Halloween is romantic?”
“Knowing you’re lack of sense you probably dare,” answered quickly the older man and sat in the chair, his leg still not in the best shape after the pain of sitting on the floor for too long. “Bunch of people lights a light on their porch for others… You can be honest and tell your beloved one he looks scarily awful and he won’t be mad… You share sweetness with people… You laugh at someone being dead or pretending to be dead or pretending to be undead… Only one day like this in a year!”
Robert stopped his activity, standing in the middle of kitchen with a package of rice in his hand and he just starred at his lover unbelievingly. Finally he blinked and smiled in response, shaking his head. Sometimes he was brutally reminded why he was standing House at his worst… Because he had no doubts about loving him, when he was at his bests.
“You’re right, I never fully appreciated it, but it’s the most romantic and loving day ever.”
“Which is why you’ll go with me for this Halloween charity party that Cuddy and Wilson are dragging me to.”
“Wait, PPTH Costume Party? I don’t have a costume!”
House smiled happily. Sometimes, some people worked so beautifully into his plans and traps that there was no way to not love them.
+++
“Remind me again, why did I agree to do this?” asked Chase through clenched teeth, fake smile firmly plastered on his face.
“Because you loooo-ove me,” sing-songed House with absolutely honest grin.
He glanced back at his lover, who was nervously adjusting his collar and his mood brightened even more. There was nothing better than a great plan coming true.
“Yeah, sure. Again: why would I love such a sadistic bastard?”
“No idea, masochist,” answered House automatically, but he sobered slightly.
Maybe he wasn’t great at relationships, but he was pretty sure you weren’t supposed to tell your lover you don’t love him on the most romantic day of the year. Diagnostician only shrugged, knowing his Wombat he was going to swear he loves him and call him God before the evening will end. House was pretty sure he already got the idea of how invoke such a reaction.
“What… Oh my God… It was House’s idea, wasn’t it?”
The blush colored Chase’s cheeks and House barely stopped the maniac laughter that was bubbling in him. He decided the evil smirk was more then enough, and somehow better suited his costume anyway. He looked straight at his best friend, who was staring at Chase’s cloth and priest collar with morbid curiosity.
“It’s so brilliant it had to be,” he admitted and looked closer at Wilson’s own costume, before shaking his head. “I see tough you’re still picking your costumes yourself… Or, please tell me, it was some poor balled kid you couldn’t say ‘no’ to?”
“I think I can still dress myself, thank you very much.”
“You think…” House shook his head, sliding his eyes over Wilson’s costume. “Be honest, you have your briefs over your tights underneath?”
Wilson just rolled his eyes, but Chase snickered quietly, so House counted this as more or less a victory. He was sort of hoping Wilson will finally acknowledge his fake-saint-opinion and express some wicked sense of humor by dressing up as an angel. That’d be fun, especially in contradiction to House’s own, devil suit. Ah, hell, he’d have to be satisfied with corrupting Father Robert. Again, that is.
Obviously an angel was a bit too much for Wilson, at first you couldn’t even see his costume at all. He had his usual brown suit pants and a white button-up shirt. The only thing was that the shirt was widely opened on the upside, revealing the tight, blue shirt with big Superman sign.
“What are you dressed up for, anyway? Superman? Klark Kent? Sad and forgetful hybrid of both?”
“I’m somewhere between those two.”
“Uuuh. Kinky.” Wilson just glared. “So? Where’s the witch? I had to let her know I decided to show up.”
“I’m sure she’d be trilled. And she’s not a witch.”
“Awww,” mocked House. “That’s soooooooo sweeet! Wilson protects his evil boss… Wait a minute, she didn’t still my idea for a costume, did she?”
Wilson just snorted. As if. Cuddy probably came in ready for the fact that no matter what she’ll wear House will joke about it, but she sure wasn’t going encourage such behavior.
“No, mister Satan. She’s slightly less evil,” he pointed to the woman standing near the center of the lobe.
In the same moment she finally caught the sight of the hospital’s main devil and started making her way through the crowd to join them. Red-white dress impressively moving with her every step, with just barely heard above the parties noises, sound of the silky materials sliding against each other. When she finally stopped next to the three men, House’s eyes automatically ventured to her impressive bust line, that black gorse was exposing beautifully.
“Wow. Even more breasted and even more powerful… You should you got changed in Halloween costume and not your Sunday’s robe?” mocked House, but Cuddy just smiled unimpressed and just slide her eyes on his costume.
Obviously neither the horns nor the red, bellowing cloak made much impression. And she just shook her head at House’s t-shirt and cane with flames. The diagnostician started worry that he’s costume is not as amazing as he thought of it, but then he was rewarded for his choice of clothing after all.
“Oh my God. Did House make you wear this?” asked tonight’s Queen of Hearts, somehow terrified.
“Sort of,” agreed Chase and House smiled happily.
“Yes, I see both of you decided to show off what a great pair you are, but really… Oh, just forget it. You’re bound to stay at least until midnight. And stop making fun from everyone’s costumes!”
House smiled at the sight of his storming off boss and then dragged his priest-clothed Wombat to one of the small tables. If he was bound to be on Halloween party he might’ve as well enjoy some Halloween candies and booze.
+++
The problem with Halloween parties was the same that was with every other parties as well: after few hours they were becoming deadly boring. And sure, the sight of awfully short skirt that was somehow a main point of 13’s ‘Dorothy’ costume was somehow entertaining. Or 13’s jokes about Cameron’s Snow White costume and asking poor, blushing girl how she’s going to get her seven guys before the night is over. Actually one of the best moments was Cameron’s suggestion that she got over that part of the story before the party started. Unfortunately it meant she was now going to fall asleep, and seeing how this party was unfolding House might just join her. And not in the funny sense either.
He was just making sure he’d have nice dreams by staring at nurse Brenda dressed up as a stabbed victim. It was almost nicer view than 13’s legs.
“Cuddy says it’s after midnight and you may run, just please don’t loose any shoes,” announced calmly Foreman, sitting on House’s side.
The diagnostician just snorted turning to the pirate-like dressed Duckling.
“She sooo doesn’t know what’s going on in which bed time story.”
“Yeah,” agreed Foreman. “So why aren’t you limping with a speed of hell’s fire to the freedom, yet?”
“I try not to look desperate,” he answered and seeing Foreman’s questioning look, he added: “And I lost my priest Wombat somewhere.”
“I think he got tired with all the looks he got, I saw him creeping out to the hospital.”
House glared at him standing up.
“His costume was perfect, at least he didn’t look as dull as you,” he protected his idea. “If you’re so into classic, why not a ghost?”
“Maybe I am a ghost of a pirate,” smiled Foreman.
“Yeah. I noticed you’re weirdly pale tonight,” mocked the older man.
“House…”
“Going.”
+++
“You know, when you hook up with a cripple it’s not considered nice to hide from him, so he have to walk through whole hospital to find you,” informed House calmly, entering the chapel.
“You probably went here in the first place, knowing that I’ll end up here,” answered Chase calmly, not even looking back.
House just shrugged. So maybe he was brilliant enough to guess where his guilt-driven Wombat will end up, but it still wasn’t nice to hide from a cripple who could be already on the way home right now.
He sat next to his lover and glanced without much interest at the altar.
“So… You felt romantic need to see the place, where we first met?”
Chase snorted and it was more than House expected, still he was glad to hear that. Snorting Chase was not Depressed Guilt-Driven Ex-Priest Chase…. And that was good. House put his hand on his lover’s thigh, pressing slowly higher.
“What-What the hell are you doing?”
“Adding to the romantic atmosphere… And we’re in the chapel, not hell.”
“Well, we *will* be in hell.”
“Oh, don’t worry, I have some good friends there.”
“I bet you do… House! Stop it! Oh… Oh, God.”
House stopped suddenly all his movements and enjoyed a disappointed sound Chase unconsciously made.
“Read the shirt,” he hissed and enjoyed Chase’s quiet laugh.
The Australian actually looked at the shirt with a smile, even if in the dim light of the chapel the words were barely visible. He knew what was written there, right under a small picture of devil’s head.
God is busy. Can I help you?
“That’s insane,” stated Chase and House might have believed him if he hadn’t heard the sound of a zipper being opened.
“I take it I actually can help you?” he asked when Chase dumped his trousers and moved himself so he was now before House, his legs kneeling on the bench on either side of his lover. He started working on House’s zipper now.
“Yeah, pretty mu-uch… Oh, God.”
“That’s not my name,” scolded House and pinched the skin under his hand, while trying to hold up the priest cloth. On of his warm hands slid to back on Chase’s ass, caressing the well-known flesh.
“Oh, fuck!”
“Closer, but still not that.”
“House would you for fuck say move your ass before someone will come here?”
“Nope,” answered House with a smile. “But I’ll move yours in the same time as someone will come here, ok?”
“Oh, G…”
“A-a!”
“Greg…”
“Much better.”
*The End*
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Cuddy: pic pic
13: (slightly shorter stockings, slightly longer dress) : pic
Foreman: (without the fake hair, lol) : pic
(And I decided not to dress Foreman in Blade costume that theoretically won the poll I made for this fic. I thought Foreman wouldn’t bother with something so much more specific, and a pirate costume is classy and you can get it practically every place with costume).
Cameron: pic
(Sorry, in the poll I mistook sleeping beauty with the Snow White. I just decided to go along with the Snow White.)
Wilson: (that’s sort of how he’s costume looked) : pic
(Sorry to disappoint everyone who was hoping for Wilson in tights XD)
House: (sort of, but with his own shirt) : pic
: (the shirt, or at least the sign on it ^_^) : pic
Chase: (in case you forgot about this crate manip natinio did!) : pic
Thanks for Watching! And Reading!
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Happy Halloween Everyone!