(no subject)
Being back at the same place after a year makes you think what have you accomplished so far, from then till now.
The thoughts are slightly depressing. Like how the violin now seems like an impulse, or how sign language has remained stagnated. Both I once resoluted to master, of which none I did. You would've usually opposed to change, but this time I had hoped to find more. How we've been conditioned to want to be better. The only thing that appears to be on track, is getting into the honours programme. Inching. Surely more can be done? One thing I was glad though, my iPod has stuck around.
It was horrible today at work. I did nothing productive - because there was nothing to do - and no one mind. The utter lack of motivation to even remotely try to socialise, to have to feign a chuckle at lunch because it would be weird to have remained quiet all those while, and still be the only one not laughing, I couldn't wait for it to end. I was getting paid to read, but I would rather have paid for coffee and read elsewhere. How do people who don't enjoy what they are doing get through day after day? Does making ends meet really provide the motivation required? I think they can't. But I wouldn't know, I've never been caught in that situation. Maybe all these grouchiness is because I'm not used to the waking hours.
Caught eat pray love. Quite certain that the book's better even though I've never read it. You could watch the movie, imagine how the book would have depicted the scenes, and look back at the movie and find it lacking, somehow. I'm still undecided on whether I like the idea of taking a sabbatical. I would definitely want to. I'm just skeptical about if you could really leave all your worries behind, go out and explore the greater things out there, develop new perspectives, and return to find meaning in things that didn't. And it isn't free.
The thoughts are slightly depressing. Like how the violin now seems like an impulse, or how sign language has remained stagnated. Both I once resoluted to master, of which none I did. You would've usually opposed to change, but this time I had hoped to find more. How we've been conditioned to want to be better. The only thing that appears to be on track, is getting into the honours programme. Inching. Surely more can be done? One thing I was glad though, my iPod has stuck around.
It was horrible today at work. I did nothing productive - because there was nothing to do - and no one mind. The utter lack of motivation to even remotely try to socialise, to have to feign a chuckle at lunch because it would be weird to have remained quiet all those while, and still be the only one not laughing, I couldn't wait for it to end. I was getting paid to read, but I would rather have paid for coffee and read elsewhere. How do people who don't enjoy what they are doing get through day after day? Does making ends meet really provide the motivation required? I think they can't. But I wouldn't know, I've never been caught in that situation. Maybe all these grouchiness is because I'm not used to the waking hours.
Caught eat pray love. Quite certain that the book's better even though I've never read it. You could watch the movie, imagine how the book would have depicted the scenes, and look back at the movie and find it lacking, somehow. I'm still undecided on whether I like the idea of taking a sabbatical. I would definitely want to. I'm just skeptical about if you could really leave all your worries behind, go out and explore the greater things out there, develop new perspectives, and return to find meaning in things that didn't. And it isn't free.